The Nextlander Watchcast

The process of tearing apart our consumerist childhoods is far from over, as the Watchcast crew digs this week into G.I. Joe: The Movie, another toy commercial in disguise that comes up with some of the most bonkers stuff this franchise ever saw, both for better and for worse.
CHAPTERS:

(00:00:00) - The Nextlander Watchcast Episode 165: G.I. Joe: The Movie (1987)
(00:00:18) - Intro.
(00:08:47) - A brief history of Government Issue Joe, and our personal fandoms.
(00:26:37) - More on the tone of the show, and how that filtered into the movie.
(00:30:56) - How this movie came to be, and why it never made it to theaters.
(00:39:19) - Talking about our cast (and porno cartoons).
(00:51:31) - Are the new grunts as good as the old timers?
(00:56:51) - Break!
(00:57:40) - We're back and we're already humming this musical number.
(01:02:46) - People have had it with Cobra Commander.
(01:12:15) - The B.E.T.--no, not that B.E.T.
(01:17:16) - Stumbling into Cobra-la.
(01:23:46) - Our cavalcade of new stars (toys).
(01:40:30) - There's no way Cobra could break in here! And the lore dump to end all lore dumps.
(01:57:05) - Falcon gets airdropped into unincorporated Slaughter territory.
(02:02:35) - Roadblock and Cobra I Was Once a Commaaaaaannnder escape.
(02:09:52) - A sneaking mission to Cobra Island, and it's time to send in the sandworms.
(02:16:48) - He's gone into a coma!
(02:24:34) - A big dumb battle to end this movie.
(02:35:52) - Duke's okay! Somehow!
(02:37:57) - Final thoughts.
(02:46:46) - Housekeeping for next week's movie: Masters of the Universe!
(02:51:31) - Outro.

The Watchcast is back for another year, and we're kicking off 2026 by laying waste to our plastic filled childhoods! The first entry in our trio of toy commercials disguised as films is one very near and dear to our youthful hearts in Transformers: The Movie, a film that simultaneously enthralled and traumatized an entire generation of budding robot enthusiasts, and tested the limits of how many popular characters you can kill off in the name of commerce.
CHAPTERS:

(00:00:00) - The Nextlander Watchcast Episode 164: Transformers: The Movie (1986
(00:00:25) - Intro.
(00:05:57) - Let's talk about our own histories with Transformers fandom.
(00:14:45) - On the trauma of Transformer murder.
(00:20:49) - How did Transformers (generally) come into existence? And some other miscellaneous bits.
(00:31:55) - Onto the movie, and who is responsible for all this.
(00:38:14) - Killing off the old toy line.
(00:44:54) - What a (bizarre) cast! And soundtrack!
(01:00:19) - Break!
(01:00:50) - We're back, and real quick, let's chat about the version we watched.
(01:03:22) - Kicking off your kids movie with an entire planet being devoured.
(01:10:46) - Leaping into the year 2005, and everybody's got moonbases now.
(01:15:59) - Say goodbye to several Autobots.
(01:19:48) - Hot Rod, Kup, Arcee, and the rest!
(01:29:00) - Optimus is here to save the--oh no.
(01:35:47) - The scene that middle-aged nerds still describe to their therapists.
(01:40:18) - Unicron, Galvatron, and various Cyclonuses.
(01:51:43) - Eat it, Starscream.
(01:54:09) - On Arcee, and how the party gets split.
(02:00:12) - Are the Quintessons interesting? A debate.
(02:08:33) - Are the Junkions interesting? No.
(02:13:02) - Unicron goes ham, and Rodimus is born.
(02:29:14) - Final thoughts.
(02:40:31) - Teeing up for next week's movie: G.I. Joe: The Movie!
(02:43:46) - Outro.

We've got one more Watchcast for you in 2025, and we're closing out a cursed year the only way we know how: with Gremlins. Join us as we take a trip back to a simpler time when zonked out suburbanites could shrug off the enormous implications of a lifeform like a mogwai in favor of taking cute photos and dumping water all over it.

CHAPTERS:

(00:00:00) - The Nextlander Watchcast Episode 163: Gremlins (1984)

(00:00:15) - Intro.

(00:05:23) - How we all experienced Gremlins back in the day.

(00:09:20) - Some Gremlins 2 comparison chat, and the wild list of names involved in making this movie happen.

(00:20:08) - Some production stories and voice cast chat.

(00:28:54) - Our remaining cast.

(00:42:04) - Break!

(00:42:29) - We're back, and it's time to do some shopping in Chinatown.

(00:49:54) - Welcome to backlot America.

(00:58:12) - Bringing home a Mogwai.

(01:02:26) - We told you not to get them wet! It's only been like five minutes!

(01:07:28) - You can't even trust a science teacher in this day and age.

(01:14:25) - Gross pods, and a number of check-ins with dad.

(01:23:02) - We should all be so lucky to have a mother who can dual wield.

(01:29:27) - Let's kill off all our minor townspeople right quick.

(01:37:37) - Phoebe Cates, everyone. Let's give her a round of applause.

(01:40:53) - Burning down the theater.

(01:43:06) - Not an amazing finale, but definitely an amazing melting puppet skeleton.

(01:46:45) - Once again, suburbanites cannot be trusted to handle unusual wildlife.

(01:49:35) - Final thoughts.

(01:54:59) - A teaser (not full schedule) for next month's movies.

We do a lot of goofy movies on this Watchcast, but now, at the behest of our own Vinny Caravella, it's time for us to tackle some Important Cinema! Vinny has chosen the one and only Citizen Kane for his movie this month, and it's time to put our film school pants on to decide once and for all if it's an over-hyped disappointment, or really as great as everyone says.

CHAPTERS:

(00:00:00) - The Nextlander Watchcast Episode 162: Citizen Kane (1941)

(00:00:14) - Intro.

(00:05:09) - Picking apart some of what makes Citizen Kane so dang important.

(00:13:27) - The myriad parodies and loving tributes to Kane peppered throughout our childhood media.

(00:15:45) - On Welles, and how the film came to be.

(00:23:23) - Welles' various collaborators.

(00:33:04) - The Hearst campaign to derail the movie.

(00:42:06) - Break!

(00:44:20) - We're back, and it's time to head on down to Xanadu.

(00:52:26) - Love a good newsreel.

(00:56:58) - A brief meeting with Kane's second wife, and then we dig into Kane's childhood.

(01:05:57) - Yung Kane.

(01:12:19) - Bernstein, and the salad days.

(01:17:49) - Old Jed, and a marriage in a single breakfast table.

(01:22:52) - Susan enters the picture.

(01:25:52) - Will Kane's aspirations ever be knocked down? Yes!

(01:37:54) - Kane Weds 'Singer', Kane Cans Critic!

(01:43:05) - Susan spills the beans.

(01:49:54) - A very bad picnic, and Kane turns his wife's room into a rage room.

(01:57:11) - What's a Rosebud? Who cares! Take everything!

(02:03:07) - Final thoughts.

(02:10:05) - Housekeeping for next week's movie: Gremlins!

(02:11:38) - Outro.

The Watchcast is back for its final slate of movies in 2025, and this month we're picking whatever strikes our fancy. First up is Alex's pick, a palate cleanser for all the Escape from New York also-rans we've seen this year in the form of actual, honest-to-Snake Escape from New York! Join us as we dive deep into the movie that spawned an iconic character, dozens of rip-offs, and pretty much Hideo Kojima's whole deal.

CHAPTERS:

(00:00:00) - The Nextlander Watchcast Episode 161: Escape from New York (1981)

(00:00:15) - Intro.

(00:08:18) - How did John Carpenter realize his vision of crime-scorched hellscape New York

(00:26:23) - The insane cultural shadow that this movie cast.

(00:33:51) - Crime has risen 400%, so New York is a prison now. You don't need to know anything else.

(00:41:55) - The President is crashing out.

(00:46:40) - Break!

(00:47:00) - We're back, and it's time for a quick failed rescue.

(00:49:44) - Our first introduction to Snake Plissken.

(00:59:55) - Gliding into the Big Apple.

(01:03:28) - No matter how bad things get in New York, people will still make time for the theater.

(01:07:47) - We've got C.H.U.D.S, and also Kurt Russell's (then) wife.

(01:15:36) - Maggie and the Brain.

(01:19:09) - Here comes The Duke of New York.

(01:23:34) - This is a sneaking mission.

(01:27:35) - The Duke wants his damn map, and Brain figures out where the glider is.

(01:32:04) - That's Ox Baker's music!

(01:39:37) - The mad dash to the World Trade Center, then to the bridge.

(01:46:20) - An even madder dash over the wall.

(01:48:25) - Snake ain't letting this slide.

(01:54:28) - Final thoughts.

(01:59:44) - Our remaining films for the month.

(02:04:19) - Outro.