It's Not About the Alcohol

For two years, "reduce your drinking by 80%" was my signature phrase. It's on my website, my ads, my podcast — everywhere. In this episode, I tell you why I retired it, what I replaced it with, and what this shift means for you — whether you're in my program or hearing my voice for the first time.
This is a behind-the-scenes episode pulled from Coffee with Colleen, my daily internal podcast for clients inside The Next Chapter. You'll hear me talk about how my own messaging accidentally did the thing I teach women not to do — and how catching that blind spot led to a complete rebrand, a new masterclass, and a brand new way into this work.
In this episode:
Why "drink less" is a negative goal — and what your brain actually does with it
The real reason it gets harder to stay on track once you feel better
What "take it or leave it" means and why those four words change everything
The counterintuitive first step that sets my approach apart from every other program
New ways to work with me at every level 
Links mentioned in this episode:
📞 BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL — $2,000 tuition discount on The Next Chapter expires Feb 28. As long as you book the call before the 28th, we'll honor the discount. [LINK]
🎥 Watch The FREE Masterclass— The Science Behind Take It or Leave It: Why Some Women Can and How You Can Too  [LINK]
🎧 Get the Starter Bundle ($444) — RISE + Skills for Mindful Drinking. The complete Take It or Leave It methodology. Nothing held back. [LINK]
Know someone who needs to hear this? Send her this episode. You don't have to say anything — just send the link.

Most women measure alcohol consumption by how much and how often they drink. But the research says the most important predictor of whether your drinking becomes a real problem isn't about the amount you drink — it's why you drink.
In this episode, I tell the story of the exact day I became a daily drinker — and why I didn't even know it happened. I break down the neuroscience of why drinking to reduce stress is the fast pass to addiction, even if you're not drinking more than anyone else.
In this episode, you'll learn:
Why your reason for drinking matters more than how much you drink

The neurological shift that turns a social drinker into a dependent one — and why it's invisible from the outside

How your brain works like an algorithm that quietly narrows your options one drink at a time

The science of why alcohol actually creates stress instead of relieving it (and the cortisol cycle that explains your 3am wake-up)

Why "tolerance" isn't a flex — it's a symptom of something you need to understand

The litmus test that reveals whether you can actually take it or leave it

What the largest study of its kind (43,000+ people) says about how fast stress drinkers develop dependence

If this episode resonated with you:
Watch The FREE Masterclass → The science of take it or leave it–why some women can and how you can too.
Book A FREE Discovery Call→ It's not a sales pitch. It's a coaching conversation to help you figure out where you are, where you want to be, and how to get there. Right now through February 28th, I'm offering $2,000 off of my year-long program, The Next Chapter.
I've never done a discount like this and I won't be doing one again.
 
Connect with me:
Watch The FREE Masterclass

BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL.

YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer

TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer

Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer

X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

✦ February Bonus ✦
Join The Next Chapter by February 28, 2026 and receive $2,000 off. 

In this episode, Colleen reframes one of the biggest misunderstandings about drinking: it's not one behavior — it's a collection of hundreds of habits shaped by context, environment, relationships, and emotional states.
Many women believe their drinking defines who they are because they identify with their worst moments. But emotional sobriety requires a more nuanced understanding. The way you drink when you're alone may be completely different from how you drink socially, with family, or during high-stimulation environments — and each context activates different neural pathways, roles, and protective patterns.
Colleen shares a personal example from a recent holiday gathering where old habits resurfaced despite years of progress. Instead of interpreting it as failure, she approached it as data — an opportunity to reconnect with a younger protective part of herself and practice intentional, mindful drinking strategies.
 
🔑 Key Takeaways
Why drinking is not one habit, but hundreds of context-driven behaviors



How identifying with your worst drinking moments keeps you stuck



Why old neural pathways don't disappear — they reactivate in familiar environments



The difference between mindful drinking and autopilot drinking



How roles and code-switching influence alcohol use around specific people



Why positive goals ("drink mindfully") work better than avoidance goals ("don't overdo it")

 
Click here to Book A Discovery Call. Enroll before February 28, 2026 and receive $2,000 off! Calls book up fast. Don't miss your chance! 
 
Find me on:
YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer
TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer
Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer 
X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

You think your cravings are a willpower problem. They're not. You think if you could just think differently, you'd drink differently. And that's exactly why nothing has worked.
In this episode, I'm breaking down why the urge to drink starts in your body — not your brain — and giving you three red flags that your drinking is actually a symptom of something most high-achieving women refuse to look at.
In this episode, you'll learn:
The litmus test that reveals whether you can actually "take it or leave it" (be honest with yourself on this one)

Why saying you're "not an emotional person" is the most dangerous thing you can believe about yourself

Three everyday behaviors that are quietly dysregulating your nervous system — and setting you up to overdrink by evening

The science of why you can't stop at two (it's called the biphasic line, and once you understand it, everything clicks)

Why you wake up at 3am full of self-loathing — and why that voice isn't really you

What's actually happening in your body between 6am and 6pm that makes evening-you a completely different person than morning-you

Why "trying harder" is aimed at the wrong part of your brain

 
If you are ready to get support from a community of women who are co-creating this change with intention and clarity— Click here to BOOK A DISCOVERY CALL. 
 
Find me on:
YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer
TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer
Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer 
X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc

In this episode, Colleen continues sharing takeaways from her retreat with Dr. Amanda Hanson (midlifemuse) — and she names something that sits underneath so much of women's drinking, overgiving, perfectionism, and burnout: conditioning.
Not just childhood conditioning — cultural conditioning.
Colleen explains how patriarchy functions like an invisible rulebook: the expectations women follow without ever agreeing to them. Be good. Be pleasant. Be grateful. Don't be angry. Don't be too much. Don't embarrass anyone. Don't need too much. Don't take up space. Don't make people uncomfortable.
And over time, those rules don't just shape behavior — they create trauma. They train women to silence their truth, distrust their instincts, and prioritize everyone else's emotional experience over their own. And when a woman is disconnected from her needs, her voice, and her power, escapism becomes inevitable.
That's why Colleen connects this conversation directly to emotional sobriety: freedom isn't just about alcohol. It's about ending self-abandonment, taking radical ownership of your emotional life, and becoming the kind of woman who can handle discomfort without shrinking, pleasing, or numbing.
🔑 Key Takeaways
How culture trains women to abandon themselves to stay safe



Why patriarchy is a trauma system, not a debate topic



How women unconsciously enforce the rules by judging other women



Why "going along to get along" is survival, not character



How escapism becomes the nervous system's only outlet



Why emotional sobriety requires self-trust more than self-control



The reframe: not "tear it down," but rise into power



This is a reminder that you're not here to become a "better woman."
You're here to become a Free woman.
You don't need to be "ready." You just need to be honest with yourself about where you are. Start With A Discovery Call ~ CLICK HERE. 
 
Find me on:
YouTube: @HangoverWhisperer
TikTok: @hangoverwhisperer
Instagram: @thehangoverwhisperer 
X (Twitter) : @NotAboutTheAlc