Blonde Apologist

When a spouse leaves the Church, it can feel like everything in your marriage shifts overnight. In this episode, I sit down with Iuri Melo, a licensed therapist with over 20 years of experience, to talk about what this actually looks and feels like for both people; the believing spouse and the one stepping away. We get into the emotions, the mistakes that can create more distance, and what actually helps couples stay connected. We also talk about therapy, what a healthy mixed-faith marriage can look like, and how to navigate raising kids when beliefs differ.

My husband’s back to join me in a discussion on the law of chastity. What actually counts as breaking the law of chastity? What’s “on and off limits” according to For the Strength of Youth? And how does this commandment look different in dating vs. marriage? In this episode we share our experience trying to live this imperfectly, talk about things like pornography and share our plans for teaching this important commandment to our kids.

Episode on LDS sexual theology and where our culture gets it wrong: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0gjGqnhRCF7EPlccYSoTAA?si=7hnwld_BS6G8k2hR_mRycg

Episode that is essentially sex ed but with a therapist:
https://open.spotify.com/episode/3HM2BSr7jTSbSbp8ayHUjA?si=9IGGRqXIReyp4IIjD5ztvw

Episode on pornography with a therapist: https://open.spotify.com/episode/20YbQhpKjRAn6A2vr3eQ8N?si=SBIvw_TJRdyu6V4CKoTjRg

After receiving hundreds of your questions and concerns, I sat down with Dr. Gerrit Dirkmaat and Dr. Richard LeDuc from The Standard of Truth Podcast to have an honest, thoughtful conversation about one of the most complex topics in Church history: polygamy. This episode doesn’t attempt to answer every question, but the Spirit was strongly present throughout the conversation. It explores how early Saints responded to practicing polygamy, possible reasons God commanded it, and offers a closer look at complex aspects of the history; including Joseph Smith being sealed to a 14-year-old girl and Emma Smith’s experience. It also addresses what this practice could mean for eternity and the challenge of reconciling something that may feel uncomfortable while continuing to hold onto faith.

Resources for further study:
Book Recommendation

https://a.co/d/0ethk4qr

Plural Marriage in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/gospel-topics-essays/plural-marriage-in-the-church-of-jesus-christ-of-latter-day-saints?lang=eng

This overview essay establishes that monogamy is the church’s standing law of marriage but acknowledges God commanded plural marriage in biblical times and again through Joseph Smith. It covers D&C 132, the purposes of plural marriage, and the eventual cessation of the practice. 

Plural Marriage in Kirtland and Nauvoo

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/gospel-topics-essays/plural-marriage-in-kirtland-and-nauvoo?lang=eng

Focuses on the origins under Joseph Smith in the 1830s–1840s. Discusses the angel with a drawn sword, Joseph’s multiple wives (including polyandrous marriages to women already married to other men), the secrecy surrounding early practice, and Emma Smith’s reactions.

Plural Marriage and Families in Early Utah

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/gospel-topics-essays/plural-marriage-and-families-in-early-utah?lang=eng

Covers the 1847–1890 period. Addresses demographics (20–30% of Latter-day Saint families practiced it),  daily life in plural families, financial and interpersonal challenges, women’s agency,  and U.S. government anti-polygamy legislation.

The Manifesto and the End of Plural Marriage:

https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/manual/gospel-topics-essays/the-manifesto-and-the-end-of-plural-marriage?lang=eng

In this episode, I share my thoughts on the new season of The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives and why I’ve decided I won’t be watching anymore. I talk about the sadness I feel for the families and children affected, the uncomfortable feelings the show stirred for me, and some common online reactions about gospel living, family roles, and media portrayals of our faith. I end with a reminder this Easter season of the hope and peace we can find in our Savior, who lives!!

Is it possible to grow while raising kids? In this episode, Montana Coles and I talk about developing ourselves in motherhood, avoiding comparison, making mom friends, and partnering with Christ through the highs and the lows.