ON BOYS Podcast

• Helping Boys Find A Path to Manhood

  How do we help boys along the path to manhood? That’s a question Paul Cumbo, a veteran educator, has been asking for a long time. It’s one he’s well-positioned to answer too, given that he’s spent the past few decades of his life teaching, educating, and coaching teenage boys and young men. His latest book, A Path to Manhood, offers encouragement and advice to young men.The available evidence suggests that our boys and young men need support and guidance. Too many have withdrawn from modern life, choosing to spend most of their time online. Too many feel unwanted, useless, and accused. Paul reminds boys and men that they matter. As he writes in the in the first chapter of his book, he doesn’t “buy the cultural narrative that men are simple.” He encourages young men to chart their own path through life, and shares how listeners can help boys on their journey.Takeaways:Each person’s path to manhood is unique and must be navigated individually.Paralysis by analysis is a common issue among today’s youth.Boys crave to be needed and to contribute meaningfully.Long-term vision is essential for effective planning.Backtracking is a natural part of the journey.Transformative travel can provide profound experiences.Joy is deeper and more meaningful than mere happiness.Young men seek challenges and opportunities for growth.Experiences of genuine joy are crucial for well-being.Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:A Path to Manhood: Encouragement and Advice for Young Men, by Paul Cumbopaulcumbo.compaulcumbo.substack.com/ — Paul’s Substack newsletterCamino Institute – info re the Young Men’s International Seminar (Note: there are still some spaces left for the 3rd Annual Young Men’s International Seminar, which runs June 14-21, 2025)Wilderness Therapy with Paul Cumbo — ON BOYS podcast episodeAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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• Creating Schools Where Black Boys—and All Students—Succeed

  What if supporting Black boys could transform education for all students?David Kirkland, founder & CEO of forwardED, believes it can—and research backs him up. In this episode, David challenges educators to put a deliberate focus on Black boys, not just to address persistent disparities in academic achievement and discipline, but because creating environments where Black boys thrive benefits every student.Photo by Borce Coded via Pexels“It’s not that Black males fail. It’s that we fail Black males,” David says. To change outcomes, we need to shift the narrative—from blaming students to examining how systems and practices fall short.In this conversation, we explore:Why Black boys remain the most vulnerable student population in U.S. schoolsHow the education system contributes to disparities in achievement and disciplineThe power of reframing: shifting from “fixing students” to transforming systemsThe role of funding, culturally responsive education, and policy changes in driving real progressHow focusing on the needs of Black boys leads to better outcomes for all studentsThis isn’t just about equity for one group—it’s about reimagining education so every child can thrive.Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:www.forward-ed.com/Reclaiming Possibliity: An Intentional Focus on Black Boys This School Year — article by DavidCan We Talk? A Critical Examination of Cellphone Bans in Schools — article by DavidBlack Boys Matter — ON BOYS episodeSupporting Black Boys Mental Health (w Chandra White-Cummings) — ON BOYS episodeBoys in School Task Force — ON BOYS episodeSponsor Spotlight: Hello FreshGet 10 FREE meals at HelloFresh.com/FreeONBOYS Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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• Imperfect Men Can Build Boys Too

  Imperfect men helped Greg Hlavaty become a good guy. “I think what saved me were men who stepped in as surrogate fathers,” Greg wrote in a recent essay. Those men weren’t exactly role models: One, Greg says, “was openly racist and bragged about having lobbed bricks from overpasses in his youth.” The other was “a middle-aged alcoholic…who regularly taught class drunk.” But both “really listened” to Greg, encouraged him, and were “genuinely proud” of his accomplishments. They connected with Great — and that, as they say, made all the difference.Make Room for Less-Than-Perfect MenLimiting boys’ contact with less-than-ideal role models might be harming our boys — and our men. In this conversation, Greg & Jen explore the surprising ways flawed, imperfect men can shape boys into compassionate, confident adults, as well as how we can encourage supportive connections between boys & men.Takeaways:Surrogate father figures can have a profound impact on young men’s lives.Red flags in behavior should be assessed with context, not stigma.Accountability from mentors can guide young men towards better choices.Community involvement is essential in raising boys to be good men.Engaging in a child’s interests can strengthen bonds.Many men feel unqualified to mentor young people.Our culture often discourages intergenerational connections.Being present in a young person’s life can have a significant impact.Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:Stop Ignoring the Mental Health of Young Men — Greg’s essayIn Praise of Imperfect Men — Building Boys Bulletin post by JenWhat About Less-Than-Ideal Role Models? — Building Boys post by JenSponsor Spotlight: Hello FreshGet 10 FREE meals at HelloFresh.com/FreeONBOYS Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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• Understanding the Parent Amplification Effect

  Do you know what the parent amplification effect is? Do you know how to use it your (and your kids’!) benefit? “Because of children’s dependency on their parents, any parental remark – positive or negative – gets magnified in the child’s mind,” says Adam Galinsky, a social scientist, business school professor, dad of two boys, and author of Inspire: The Universal Path for Leading Yourself & Others. That’s the parent amplification effect.“An offhand compliment can inspire a lifelong passion, while a critical comment may lead a child to abandon an activity altogether,” Adam says. In this conversation, Adam, Jen, & Janet discuss how parents can use their words to positively impact their children.Takeaways:Our words have meaning, but we won’t always say the right thing.Offhand comments can have lasting effects on a child’s self-esteem.Parents are not perfect and will make mistakes.Children are always observing, even when we think they aren’t listening.Awareness of our impact as parents is crucial for effective communication.Guilt can be constructive, while shame can be harmful.Children are resilient and can overcome negative experiences.We can learn to be more inspiring leaders and parents.Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:Inspire: The Universal Path for Leading Yourself & OthersHow to Speak Up for Yourself — Adam’s TED talkListen to Boys & Young Men – ON BOYS episodeNonverbal Communication with Boys — ON BOYS episode Sponsor Spotlight: IXLThe world’s most popular subscription-based learning site for K–12! Get 20% off at ixl.com/TODAY. Check out IXL and use code TODAY for a great deal. Sponsor Spotlight: Hello FreshGet 10 FREE meals at HelloFresh.com/FreeONBOYS Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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• Rebels with a Cause: Dr. Niobe Way on Building a Relational World

  What happens when we prioritize independence over connection? According to Dr. Niobe Way, a developmental psychologist and author of Rebels with a Cause: Reimagining Boys, Ourselves, & Our Future, it creates a “boy culture” that isolates boys and diminishes their relational skills.Dr. Way has spent 40 years studying boys and uncovering the challenges they face as they navigate societal expectations of strength, autonomy, and self-reliance. Her research shows that these cultural messages undermine boys’ natural relational intelligence and hinder their ability to build and sustain deep friendships.In this episode, Dr. Way dives into the critical role of relationships in mental health and human flourishing—not just for boys, but for all of us. She explains how cultural norms, rather than biology, shape male behavior and outlines practical steps parents and educators can take to nurture boys’ emotional and relational capacities.Dr. Way also shares powerful insights from her research, including the wisdom of a 7th-grade boy who noted, “When we make things biology, we think we can’t change it.” This episode is a call to rethink how we support boys—and ourselves—in building the connections we all need to thrive.Takeaways:The stereotype of the self-sufficient man is damaging not only to boys but to society as a whole.Boys are born with the same relational intelligence as girls, but cultural conditioning suppresses it over time.To support boys, we need to normalize conversations about relationships and model emotional vulnerability.Fostering deep connections can improve mental health and combat harmful cultural narratives about masculinity.Links we mentioned (or should have) in this episode:www.niobe-way.comRebels with a Cause: Reimagining Boys, Ourselves, & Our Future, by Dr. Niobe WayDeep Secrets: Boys’ Friendships & The Crisis of Connection, by Dr. Niobe WayTogether: The Healing Power of Human Connection in a Sometimes Lonely World, by (U.S. Surgeon General) Vivek MurthyPink Brain, Blue Brain: How Small Differences Grow Into Troublesome Gaps – and What We Can Do About It, by Dr. Lise EliotWhen Boys Become Boys: Development, Relationships, and Masculinity, by Judy ChuThe Listening ProjectDr. Friendtastic on Boys & Friendship — ON BOYS episodeWhy Now is the Best Time to Raise Boys (w Michael Reichert) — ON BOYS episode Sponsor Spotlight: Hello FreshGet 10 FREE meals at HelloFresh.com/FreeONBOYS Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brandsPrivacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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