Think Fast Talk Smart: Communication Techniques

Whatever your message, the manner in which you deliver it is just as important.

You found the right words. You picked the right time to say them. You even tailored them to your audience. Why did your message fall flat? “It's your tone,” says Jefferson Fisher.

Fisher is a trial attorney, New York Times bestselling author, podcast host, and one of the most-followed experts in communication today. From handling high-stakes communication in the courtroom to navigating everyday conversations, he says successful messaging isn’t just about what you say, but how you say it. “It’s not your words, it’s your tone,” he says, “The words might be right, but the way you [say them] — that's what ends up controlling the day. Tone controls everything.”

In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Fisher and host Matt Abrahams explore how to set the right tone in all kinds of communication. Whether you're navigating conflict, giving and receiving feedback, or just trying to connect, Fisher offers practical techniques for ensuring the manner of your communication matches what you mean.
Episode Reference Links:
Jefferson Fisher
Jefferson’s Book: The Next Conversation Workbook
Jefferson's Podcast: The Jefferson Fisher Podcast
Ep.228 Negotiate Your Way to Success: Empathy, Mirroring, and Labeling 

Connect:
Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart Premium
Email Questions & Feedback >>> [email protected]
Episode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart Website
Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.io
Think Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube
Matt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn

Chapters:

(00:00) - Introduction

(02:28) - Stop Winning Arguments

(04:02) - Ask, Don’t Persuade

(04:33) - Defuse Tension Fast

(05:40) - Read the Room

(07:36) - Observing vs. Absorbing

(09:08) - Framing Conversations

(11:21) - Fix Digital Communication

(13:01) - Improve Your Tone

(15:53) - Break People-Pleasing

(17:18) - Setting Clear Boundaries

(20:54) - The Final Three Questions

(23:55) - Conclusion

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Thank you to our sponsors.  These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost.

This episode is sponsored by Grammarly. Let Grammarly take the busywork off your plate so you can focus on high-impact work. Download Grammarly for free today
Join our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be.

Real change isn’t about knowing what to do — it’s about actually doing it, one small choice at a time.

Change doesn’t come from one big breakthrough. It comes from the small choices we make over and over — often in moments we barely notice.

Eric Zimmer, behavior coach, host of The One You Feed podcast, and author of How A Little Becomes A Lot, says the real challenge isn’t figuring out what to do — it’s closing the gap between knowing and doing. “We all have areas where we know exactly what would help,” he says. “But somehow, we still don’t follow through.” His approach focuses on something simpler and more effective: small, low-resistance actions done consistently over time. “It’s not about doing everything,” Zimmer explains. “It’s about doing something — again and again — in the same direction.”
In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Zimmer joins host Matt Abrahams to unpack how lasting change actually happens. From building awareness in the middle of everyday life to designing habits that are easier to stick with, he shares practical strategies for turning intention into action. “You don’t need to wait until you feel ready,” he says. “You can act even when it’s uncomfortable.”
Episode Reference Links:
Eric Zimmer
Eric’s Book: How a Little Becomes a Lot
Eric’s Podcast: The One You Feed
Ep.86 Building Habits: The Key to Lasting Behavior Change 

Connect:
Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart Premium
Email Questions & Feedback >>> [email protected]
Episode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart Website
Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.io
Think Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube
Matt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn

Chapters:

(00:00) - Introduction

(02:24) - From Addiction to Transformation

(03:34) - The “Two Wolves” Parable

(05:19) - Awareness in Communication

(06:53) - Building Awareness Through Small Habits

(08:47) - The Knowing–Doing Gap

(10:11) - The SPAR Framework

(13:46) - Motivation vs. Action

(18:31) - The Final Three Questions

(23:58) - Conclusion

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Thank you to our sponsors.  These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost.

This episode is sponsored by Grammarly. Let Grammarly take the busywork off your plate so you can focus on high-impact work. Download Grammarly for free today
Join our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be.

The goals we set often lead us away from the meaning we ultimately seek.

Meaning in life isn’t a concrete point we can route toward. That’s why we need what Arthur Brooks calls “proxy goals” — and much better ones than we typically choose.
Brooks, a professor at Harvard Business School and author of The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness, says that meaning can't be pursued directly, but rather through proxy goals — markers that lead us to what we're really seeking. “The big, complex, meaning-filled things in life, you can't see them directly,” he says. “If you want to find meaning, you have to have proxy goals.” The problem is that many of us have chosen terrible proxies. “Money, power, pleasure, fame, prestige; those are really bad proxy goals for the meaning of life,” Brooks says. “You're never gonna find it.”
In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Brooks returns to the show, and with host Matt Abrahams, he explores how we can move from searching for meaning to actually finding it. From understanding the three components of meaning to transcending the “me self,” Brooks offers practical guidance for those who strive and strive, yet still feel like something’s missing.
To listen to the extended Deep Thinks version of this episode, please visit FasterSmarter.io/premium.
Episode Reference Links:
Arthur Brooks
Arthur’s Book: The Meaning of Life
Arthur’s Podcast: Office Hours
179. Finding Positive in Negative Emotions: Communication, Happiness & Wellbeing
180. Unlocking Your Future Self: Communication, Happiness & Well…
181. Why Happiness is a Direction, Not a Destination: Communicat…
182. Stop Chasing Time and Start Owning It: Communication, Happiness & Wellbeing  

Connect:
Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart Premium
Email Questions & Feedback >>> [email protected]
Episode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart Website
Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.io
Think Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube
Matt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn

Chapters:

(00:00) - Introduction

(02:26) - The Striver Mindset

(04:00) - Three Parts of Meaning

(07:50) - Me Self vs. I Self

(09:59) - Transcendence Explained

(12:04) - Proxy Goals

(14:44) - Meaning vs. Achievement

(19:01) - Daily Protocols

(20:51) - This or That

(22:25) - Conclusion

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Thank you to our sponsors.  These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost.

This episode is sponsored by Grammarly. Let Grammarly take the busywork off your plate so you can focus on high-impact work. Download Grammarly for free today
Join our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be.

Why mastering unspoken workplace communication is essential to long-term career success.

Succeeding at work doesn’t just depend on how hard you work or how smart you are. According to Erin McGoff, it often comes down to whether you understand the “secret language” everyone else seems to be speaking.

McGoff is a career creator, Forbes 30 Under 30 honoree, and author of The Secret Language of Work: Hyper Helpful Scripts for Every Situation. Known for her wildly popular AdviceWithErin platform, she helps millions of professionals phrase things more effectively — without sounding stiff or robotic. “It’s this hidden curriculum to the workforce,” she explains, describing the unwritten rules of interviews, negotiations, and professional etiquette. “It’s not written down anywhere. It’s not equally distributed.” Her mission is to make those invisible rules visible — and usable.
In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, McGoff and host Matt Abrahams explore how to communicate with confidence, advocate for yourself strategically, and build a professional brand with intention. Confidence, she says, isn’t fixed: “Confidence isn’t binary. Confidence is a spectrum.” It starts internally, with how we speak to ourselves, and strengthens when we “get really good at what you do.”
Episode Reference Links:
Erin McGoff
Erin’s Book: The Secret Language of Work
202. Own Your Brand: How to Communicate with Presence and Impact

Connect:
Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart Premium
Email Questions & Feedback >>> [email protected]
Episode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart Website
Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.io
Think Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube
Matt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn

Chapters:

(00:00) - Introduction

(04:36) - The Secret Language of Work

(06:12) - Building Confidence

(08:19) - Creating Your Professional Brand

(09:40) - Setting Expectations at Work

(12:11) - Advocate Strategically

(14:14) - Mastering First Impressions

(15:30) - Professional vs. Personal

(17:59) - Interview Before, During, After

(23:01) - Nonverbal Presence

(23:25) - The Final Three Questions

(27:24) - Conclusion

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Thank you to our sponsors.  These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost.

This episode is sponsored by Grammarly. Let Grammarly take the busywork off your plate so you can focus on high-impact work. Download Grammarly for free today
Join our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be.

How to communicate for deeper connection—and greater happiness.

Happiness isn’t just a feeling—it’s something you can actively shape through how you think, connect, and communicate.

Sonja Lyubomirsky, a distinguished professor of psychology at the University of California, Riverside and co-author of How to Feel Loved: The Five Mindsets That Get You More of What Matters Most, defines happiness as two key components: “being happy in your life and being happy with your life.” And while many people separate happiness from meaning or purpose, she explains that “they almost always go together.” Her research shows how the small habits we practice—like gratitude—can have a powerful effect, helping to “neutralize negative emotions” and shift how we see our lives. 

In this episode of Think Fast, Talk Smart, Lyubomirsky and host Matt Abrahams explore the science of wellbeing and the habits that help us feel more fulfilled. From gratitude practices to breaking free from the comparison trap, they share practical strategies for boosting happiness and explain why connection isn’t just about being loved, but truly “feeling loved.”
Episode Reference Links:
Sonja Lyubomirsky
Sonja’s Book: How To Feel Loved
179. Finding Positive in Negative Emotions: Communication, Happiness & Wellbeing
180. Unlocking Your Future Self: Communication, Happiness & Well…
181. Why Happiness is a Direction, Not a Destination: Communicat…
182. Stop Chasing Time and Start Owning It: Communication, Happiness & Wellbeing  

Connect:
Premium Signup >>>> Think Fast Talk Smart Premium
Email Questions & Feedback >>> [email protected]
Episode Transcripts >>> Think Fast Talk Smart Website
Newsletter Signup + English Language Learning >>> FasterSmarter.io
Think Fast Talk Smart >>> LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube
Matt Abrahams >>> LinkedIn

Chapters:

(00:00) - Introduction

(04:12) - Defining Happiness

(06:24) - Gratitude in Practice

(07:07) - Acting Extroverted

(09:04) - The Comparison Trap

(11:02) - Reflection vs. Rumination

(11:49) - Best Self Exercise

(13:13) - Building Positive Psychology

(14:38) - Happiness Drives Success

(16:06) - Relationships as a Seesaw

(18:26) - Being Known vs. Impressive

(21:10) - The Final Three Questions

(25:43) - Conclusion

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Thank you to our sponsors.  These partnerships support the ongoing production of the podcast, allowing us to bring it to you at no cost.

This episode is sponsored by Grammarly. Let Grammarly take the busywork off your plate so you can focus on high-impact work. Download Grammarly for free today
Join our Think Fast Talk Smart Learning Community and become the communicator you want to be.