We Shouldn't Be Friends

Ever been sacked from a job you love? Even better — ever thought you might be sacked, and had to hang around for days in the office corridor waiting to find out? This is what a coupla handfuls of professional surfers just went through at Merewether Beach, with the tiny little addition of it all being on full, worldwide, public display. Competition surfing might be the only kind of surfing capable of making a surfer actually cry, and it sure did in Newcastle. So…why do it, and how do you accommodate the mad rushes of feeling around winning and losing long enough to make a career out of it? We asked the fantastic Pam Burridge to help us understand this carnage.

Ever been sacked from a job you love? Even better — ever thought you might be sacked, and had to hang around for days in the office corridor waiting to find out? This is what a coupla handfuls of professional surfers just went through at Merewether Beach, with the tiny little addition of it all being on full, worldwide, public display. Competition surfing might be the only kind of surfing capable of making a surfer actually cry, and it sure did in Newcastle. So…why do it, and how do you accommodate the mad rushes of feeling around winning and losing long enough to make a career out of it? We asked the fantastic Pam Burridge to help us understand this carnage.

While we’re on the subject…competition! In case you haven’t tried it, Hannah’s recently gone there on your behalf, and she’s rapidly finding out what a triple-edged sword it can be. You THINK you’re ripping, everyone TELLS YOU you’re ripping, you KNOW you’re the best … and you come third in your heat. Imagine going through this ego-mincer for a living. Well, over the coming week, the citizens of the fine city of Newcastle are about to see it in all its awkward glory, as a few handfuls of surfers try to jump levels — from the Challenger series to the big game. They have a week to show it or blow it. Who are they, and how will they survive this nonsense?

In the past four days, we’ve seen a classic, vaguely farcical, perhaps even hilarious story play out at the very top end of organised competitive surfing. On the surface it looks pretty simple: the WSL CT pros are cut up over a new Olympic selection criteria issued by the International Surfing Association for LA28. The criteria looks like a kick in the teeth for the CT crew, limiting their selection to just 10 of the 48 slots on offer. Couple that with the fact that nobody at the ISA asked for their opinion, and blammo! Angry surf stars everywhere. But behind this brouhaha lies a deeper saga: an epic, long running power play over what’s become the most precious prize in the sport: an Olympic gold medal. Nick and Hannah go to town on it with the help of the fantastic and very clear-minded Leo Fioravanti, who knows from experience what a medal shot feels like.

2026 is pro surfing’s 50th anniversary, and it’s been fifty years of epic carnage. 28,000 surfers. Over a billion dollars of investment. You can love it, hate it, or just not care about it, but you can’t really deny it — since 1976, the world tour has grown from very scrappy beginnings into one of surfing’s most potent cultural forces. In these special episodes, Hannah and I look at what’s driven this wild ride, who’s done the driving, and why they even bothered. This one delves into how the groundwork was semi-accidentally laid for a tour to occur — sponsored by a cigarette company, an enthusiastic vodka marketer, and the Australian bottlers of a black fizzy drink.