Get Your Guy Coaching Podcast

Do you date from survival, fear, or joy?

If you’ve ever spiraled over a text, accepted crumbs because something felt better than nothing, or cut off a good man before he could get close, this episode is for you.

In this episode, I break down the 3 modes of dating: survival, fear, and joy. Your dating mindset shapes who you choose, what you accept, and how you feel the whole time. I’m getting real about dating anxiety, how to stop settling, and how to attract a high-value man by dating from curiosity and confidence instead of scarcity and self-protection. This is the kind of dating advice for women that I give my clients every day, because getting a boyfriend who’s right for you starts with the mode you’re in.

Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome + what I've been up to (London, AfroTech, book news)
03:40 The 3 modes of dating (and why you spiral over a text)
05:20 The staircase: the question each mode asks on a date
07:40 Survival mode: signs you're dating from scarcity
11:00 The Crumb Audit exercise
13:10 Pre-order Girl, Get Your Guy
14:25 Fear mode: red flag hunting, testing men, cutting him off
20:30 The vulnerability exercise
22:20 Take the Dating Archetype Quiz
23:20 Joy mode: what it looks like
28:55 The post-date exercise
31:10 Book a call + DM me your mode

Take 10 seconds to tap Follow so you never miss an episode. And if this one hit home, send it to the girlfriend who needs to hear it.

Not sure which mode you’re in? Take the Dating Archetype Quiz

Ways I can help you:

Pre-order my book, Girl, Get Your Guy! (launching February 2, 2027). When you pre-order, you get instant access to Anwar AI for personalized dating advice 24/7, plus monthly group calls with me where you bring your real dating situations, and I give you direct feedback.
Book a call with me. I’ve been getting a LOT of DMs and emails asking to chat, so I’ve opened up a few spots on my calendar.
Join the Get Your Guy Club for a year of dating support at your own pace, including my weekly group calls, private Facebook group, monthly 1-on-1s, and my 40+ hour course.
More from me:
Missed my Q&A TikTok Lives? Catch up here!

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar

Send us Fan Mail
Thank you for listening, girl. 

If this episode helped you, here’s how you can help me (it takes less than a minute):

Tap Follow on Apple Podcasts so you never miss an episode
Leave a rating or a short review. Tell me what clicked for you. I read them!

Every follow and share helps more women find this podcast and get ready for the love they deserve.

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar

Were you taught to “just wait on God” for love?
If you were raised in the church, still carry a Christian upbringing with you, or you’re a recovering church girlie who wonders why dating feels so hard, this episode is for you.
I sat down with my friend and fellow Get Your Guy coach, Coach Lauren Mathues, for an honest conversation about dating, healing, and getting out of your own way. We talk about the messages many of us grew up with, from purity culture to “just wait on God,” and how they quietly shape the way we date. Then we get into how to rethink dating, and why taking action matters more than waiting for love to find you. This is the kind of Christian dating advice I wish more women heard.
Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome + meet Coach Lauren
03:10 Why every girl listening has a church girl background
05:40 Purity culture: where it came from and what it taught women
09:10 Feeling behind? Why your "dating age" matters
11:45 The starting line: why Black and Brown women feel behind
13:20 Is it wrong to date multiple men?
19:15 The boxes Christian women check (and "he says he's a Christian")
21:10 Pre-order Girl, Get Your Guy
22:50 Your desire for partnership is real
25:40 Forgiveness vs. reconciliation
27:50 Honoring your parents without silencing yourself
35:45 "Just wait on God" and why waiting isn't a dating strategy
39:45 Where to find Coach Lauren
BIO:
Coach Lauren is a dating and relationship coach who helps singles date with clarity, confidence, and faith. Since 2018, she’s guided women through the challenges of modern dating by untangling unhelpful church teachings, healing from purity culture, and embracing their God-given identity. Now happily married for over a decade, she’s passionate about helping others find real, lasting love without compromising their values.

Resources Mentioned:
Instagram | Website
Take 10 seconds to tap Follow so you never miss an episode. And if this one hit home, send it to the girlfriend who needs to hear it.

Not sure which mode you’re in? Take the Dating Archetype Quiz

Ways I can help you:

Pre-order my book, Girl, Get Your Guy! (launching February 2, 2027). When you pre-order, you get instant access to Anwar AI for personalized dating advice 24/7, plus monthly group calls with me where you bring your real dating situations, and I give you direct feedback.
Book a call with me. I’ve been getting a LOT of DMs and emails asking to chat, so I’ve opened up a few spots on my calendar.
Join the Get Your Guy Club for a year of dating support at your own pace, including my weekly group calls, private Facebook group, monthly 1-on-1s, and my 40+ hour course.
More from me:
Missed my Q&A TikTok Lives? Catch up here!

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar
Send us Fan Mail
Thank you for listening, girl. 

If this episode helped you, here’s how you can help me (it takes less than a minute):

Tap Follow on Apple Podcasts so you never miss an episode
Leave a rating or a short review. Tell me what clicked for you. I read them!

Every follow and share helps more women find this podcast and get ready for the love they deserve.

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar

Why do your dates keep fizzling out before date three?
If you’ve mastered the vetting, you’re setting boundaries, and you still can’t get a man past the first few dates, this episode is for you. I sat down with one of my program graduates, Dr. Kelly, for a real, raw 1-on-1 dating coaching session on what’s actually behind a dating stalemate.
You’ll hear how I work through the hidden scarcity mindset that leads highly successful women to entertain men they shouldn’t, and how to stop settling. We also cover the difference between a rule and a firm dating boundary, and why chasing an outcome kills the fun. Then I give Dr. Kelly a real-world challenge: get offline, start conversations with men in person, and step back into your power as the chooser.
This episode comes from my YouTube series, What’s Your Dating Tea. About once a month, I’m bringing one of these sessions to the podcast so you can see what real dating coaching looks like behind the scenes 

Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome + Dr. Kelly's dating tea: why dates stall before date three
03:25 Wall or boundary? Say "I don't feel comfortable," not "not yet"
05:15 The video-call boundary
06:00 The scarcity mindset behind the stall
07:25 "Am I lowering my standards?"
09:15 Don't lower your standards, raise your boundaries
10:10 Are you dating your type or casting too wide a net?
12:00 Pre-order Girl, Get Your Guy
13:25 "You don't believe it's going to happen"
15:00 Online vs. offline: be the chooser
16:00 The challenge: talk to one or two men a day
18:55 Focus on dating, not the outcome
21:15 Why you need to clear out scarcity before a relationship
24:15 Who to talk to: whoever's feet are pointing toward you

Take 10 seconds to tap Follow so you never miss an episode. And if this one hit home, send it to the girlfriend who needs to hear it.

Not sure which mode you’re in? Take the Dating Archetype Quiz

Ways I can help you:

Pre-order my book, Girl, Get Your Guy! (launching February 2, 2027). When you pre-order, you get instant access to Anwar AI for personalized dating advice 24/7, plus monthly group calls with me where you bring your real dating situations, and I give you direct feedback.
Book a call with me. I’ve been getting a LOT of DMs and emails asking to chat, so I’ve opened up a few spots on my calendar.
Join the Get Your Guy Club for a year of dating support at your own pace, including my weekly group calls, private Facebook group, monthly 1-on-1s, and my 40+ hour course.
More from me:
Missed my Q&A TikTok Lives? Catch up here!

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar
Send us Fan Mail
Thank you for listening, girl. 

If this episode helped you, here’s how you can help me (it takes less than a minute):

Tap Follow on Apple Podcasts so you never miss an episode
Leave a rating or a short review. Tell me what clicked for you. I read them!

Every follow and share helps more women find this podcast and get ready for the love they deserve.

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar

Do you ever feel like you’re not beautiful enough to get the guy you want?
Beauty matters in dating, even if it shouldn’t. In this episode, I sit down with psychologist and author Dr. Allycin Powell-Hicks to talk about what beauty really is, how it shapes who gets chosen, and what it costs you when you see yourself through someone else’s eyes. We get into the science of attraction, why beauty standards keep changing, and what it means for Black and brown women. You’ll leave with simple practices you can start this week.
This one is for every woman who has ever judged herself by a standard she never chose.
Timestamps
00:00 Welcome + meet Dr. Ally
01:15 Why she studied beauty
03:00 Why beauty matters (She’s All That)
03:30 The science of attraction
06:00 How beauty standards change by decade
09:15 “I don’t feel beautiful”: whose gaze are you in?
11:45 Beauty vs. glamour
14:00 Does beauty affect how long you live?
16:00 Bias in healthcare and in swiping
18:45 How your environment changes how you see yourself
20:30 Where to travel, and Adore Tours
24:30 The boys were checking for you
25:15 Pre-order Girl, Get Your Guy
27:30 How your body changes (and thanking it)
29:30 Sweats vs. all dressed up: who gets approached?
32:00 “He’s a 3” doesn’t mean you’re a 3
33:15 Why beautiful women have a harder time dating
34:45 Patriarchy, online dating, and what lasts
38:00 Inner beauty: “safety equals beauty”
41:00 Ethnic identity and self-worth
44:15 Do Black women feel more control over their bodies?
46:00 Beauty rituals you can start now
51:00 The vision closet
53:00 Curate your closet, be curious, not critical
55:15 Where to find Dr. Ally
BIO:
Dr. Allycin Powell-Hicks is a psychofuturist, mental health expert, and media personality fascinated by the intertwining ways beauty, identity, and culture shape human behavior. With a Ph.D. in Psychology and clinical training at Kaiser Permanente and Cedars-Sinai, she has built a career translating complex science into conversations people actually want to have.
Whether she's unpacking the neuroscience of attraction, questioning beauty standards we've mistaken for truth, or exploring why we care so much what strangers think of us, Dr. Ally approaches mental health with equal parts rigor, humor, and gentle irreverence. She believes the most interesting thing about a person is almost never what they look like—it's what they choose, how they carry themselves, and the ideas they organize their lives around.
Her career reflects that same curiosity. From academia and television to comedy stages and corporate boardrooms, the diversity of her experiences has been driven by a habit of divergent thinking: seeing connections where others see separate disciplines. That perspective has led her to work with organizations including Warner Bros. Discovery and the American Psychological Association, appear across OWN, Discovery+, Hulu, VH1, and NBC, and co-host Group Therapy, a live comedy show where psychology and stand-up unexpectedly become perfect partners.
Her debut book, The Problem with Pretty (Hachette), is the natural culmination of those intersecting passions, weaving together neuroscience, beauty culture, media, perception, identity, and human behavior to ask a deceptively simple question: What if beauty isn't what we think it is?
Resources Mentioned:
Website | Instagram | TikTok | Book: The Problem With Pretty
Take 10 seconds to tap Follow so you never miss an episode. And if this one hit home, send it to the girlfriend who needs to hear it.

Take the Dating Archetype Quiz

Ways I can help you:

Pre-order my book, Girl, Get Your Guy! (launching February 2, 2027). When you pre-order, you get instant access to Anwar AI for personalized dating advice 24/7, plus monthly group calls with me where you bring your real dating situations, and I give you direct feedback.
Book a call with me. I’ve been getting a LOT of DMs and emails asking to chat, so I’ve opened up a few spots on my calendar.
Join the Get Your Guy Club for a year of dating support at your own pace, including my weekly group calls, private Facebook group, monthly 1-on-1s, and my 40+ hour course.
More from me:
Missed my Q&A TikTok Lives? Catch up here!

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar

Send us Fan Mail
Thank you for listening, girl. 

If this episode helped you, here’s how you can help me (it takes less than a minute):

Tap Follow on Apple Podcasts so you never miss an episode
Leave a rating or a short review. Tell me what clicked for you. I read them!

Every follow and share helps more women find this podcast and get ready for the love they deserve.

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar

Are you managing your stress when you should be eliminating it?
Most of us are told to manage stress. Lisa A. Smith says the stress that wears us down is chronic, and it can be eliminated. In this episode, I sit down with Lisa for a powerful conversation about the difference between acute and chronic stress, the beliefs that keep us stuck, and how stress affects our health and the decisions we make. You’ll learn how to stop living in survival mode and start choosing differently in your life and relationships. Lisa also shares her faith-based framework: radical obedience.
This one is for every woman who is tired, overwhelmed, and sure she has no way out.
Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome + meet Lisa A. Smith
01:45 Acute vs. chronic stress
03:00 How to tell the difference
06:45 Why Black women’s stress is mostly chronic
08:15 What chronic stress does to your body and discipline
09:45 Exit, enter, and engagement strategies
11:45 Start with what you want
13:30 Making a decision in dating
15:00 What “decide” really means, and trusting yourself
16:45 Worthiness and self-betrayal
18:15 The antidote: excavation (ask why seven times)
22:00 Pre-order Girl, Get Your Guy
23:30 The four principles of radical obedience
25:15 “I can’t leave today”: what “immediately” means
27:30 Joy, not resistance
29:45 Innocence, not expectation
33:15 Homework, step 1: do nothing when you’re in your feelings
36:15 Step 2: pick your strategy
37:15 Step 3: clear your head, cut one thing
39:15 Where to find Lisa
BIO:
Lisa A. Smith, MBA, is a stress elimination strategist, transformational speaker, coach, and founder of CLARITY™, a platform dedicated to helping gifted professionals and entrepreneurs eliminate chronic stress at the root.
She is the creator of Radical Obedience®, her philosophy of complete surrender as an antidote to chronic burnout and overwhelm, and The H.E.R. Method™, a framework that helps people heal, eliminate the root causes of stress, and live with greater clarity and alignment. Lisa is currently writing a book on Radical Obedience®.
Over the past decade, Lisa has helped thousands transform their health, mindset, and lives, including helping Eric Thomas, Ph.D., the #1 motivational speaker, eliminate chronic stress. She has spoken for organizations including Microsoft, Intel, the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, and Wayne State University.
Lisa holds a bachelor’s degree in psychology and an MBA and is currently a student at Princeton Theological Seminary.

Links Mentioned:
Instagram | Facebook | Tiktok | YouTube | Website | Podcast

Take 10 seconds to tap Follow so you never miss an episode. And if this one hit home, send it to the girlfriend who needs to hear it.

Not sure which mode you’re in? Take the Dating Archetype Quiz

Ways I can help you:

Pre-order my book, Girl, Get Your Guy! (launching February 2, 2027). When you pre-order, you get instant access to Anwar AI for personalized dating advice 24/7, plus monthly group calls with me where you bring your real dating situations, and I give you direct feedback.
Book a call with me. I’ve been getting a LOT of DMs and emails asking to chat, so I’ve opened up a few spots on my calendar.
Join the Get Your Guy Club for a year of dating support at your own pace, including my weekly group calls, private Facebook group, monthly 1-on-1s, and my 40+ hour course.
More from me:
Missed my Q&A TikTok Lives? Catch up here!

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar
Send us Fan Mail
Thank you for listening, girl. 

If this episode helped you, here’s how you can help me (it takes less than a minute):

Tap Follow on Apple Podcasts so you never miss an episode
Leave a rating or a short review. Tell me what clicked for you. I read them!

Every follow and share helps more women find this podcast and get ready for the love they deserve.

Sincerely,
Coach Anwar