Feeling Good Podcast | TEAM-CBT - The New Mood Therapy

• 434: The One-Minute Drill; Memory Rescripting; and More!

  David, Matt, and Rhonda Answer Your Questions! What's the One-Minute Drill work? How does it work? What's Memory Rescripting? How does it work? How can I endure boring and irrelevant college work? Aaron asks: How do you do the One Minute Drill? Aaron asks how and why Memory Rescripting helped a college student overcome her fears of public transportation (e.g. agoraphobia). Gray asks: How can I endure having to do boring work in college and beyond? Two questions from Aaron W. C. who is a Licensed Master Social Worker in Idaho, and said, “I look forward to the podcast.” 1. Hi Dr. Burns, Can you share how you do the one-minute drill? In When Panic Attacks, you only mentioned the name but not how it works. Thank you, Aaron W. California David’s reply We'll explain and demonstrate it on the podcast. It's a partially helpful tool for troubled couples who argue and fail to listen. 2. Hi Dr. Burns, I completed rereading When Panic Attacks yesterday night. I have a question about one of the case examples you mentioned. In the book, you mention a patient that has a phobia of taking public transportation. She did the reimagination exercise of picturing herself castrating the men that harmed her roommate and branded the man that hurt her as a child. If remember right, the book does not link using the "reimagination exercise" to overcoming her fear of taking public transportation. How did the reimagination exercise help her overcome the fear of taking public transportation? I have reread the book two times this year! Thank you, Aaron W. California---LMSW (Idaho) David’s reply I am happy to include your question on an upcoming Feeling Good Podcast. Can I use your first name? Thanks! I can answer two of your questions, and can even demonstrate the one-minute drill, and discuss its uses and limitations. Best, david 3. Gray asks about feeling better about post-secondary education Hi David, I struggle with intense anger, frustration, and depression while doing college coursework, with recurring thoughts like, “This is pointless,” “This work is for nobody, ” "I'm just working to work," "I'm being hazed," and “I profoundly don’t care!” I’m interested in law school because I’d love being a lawyer, but I worry that I won’t be mentally healthy in that environment. Many lawyers say 80+% of law school is irrelevant and doesn’t adequately prepare you to practice law or even to pass the Bar, so I expect similar frustrations would resurface. I’ve looked into this very carefully and I’m convinced that the basic substance of my thoughts has bulletproof empirical grounding (outside of STEM, for sure). How could I manage these distortions when I’m in the midst of law school homework? P.S. I’m quite hostile to appeals about how I would actually learn important things in class or about developing resilience for its own sake, so I’d prefer to avoid that line of thinking unless it's really important. Thank you, Gray David’s reply Can you give me an example of one of your negative thoughts. They always contain some truth, by the way. Perhaps you’re trapped in a Hidden Should Statement. Are you wanting to feel happy about having to do boring homework, or are you wanting not to have to do boring homework? What’s your goal, in other words. All therapeutic failure, just about, is due to a failure of agenda setting. In other words, reducing resistance is the key prior to crushing distortions. Warmly, david There is certainly a great deal of irrelevant stuff one has to plow through to get a college or graduate degree, for sure. So there seems to be a lot of wisdom in your negative thoughts and feelings. I guess my question would be, what type of help, if any, are you looking for? Best, david Gray responds Subject: Re: Feeling better about post-secondary education My hidden should statements are something like "I shouldn't have to do this." and" I should be able to prove myself by doing real work instead". I am hoping to be able to do lots of boring/irrelevant homework and be okay about it, not even necessarily happy. Then I could go to law school and be in passable mental health. Thanks again! Gray David Replies Well, you’re right on all counts, including “I shouldn’t have to do this.” In fact, you DON’T “have to” do it. And if you do stick with it, there’s no rule that says you have to stop whining and complaining! I made the choice of going to medical school and hated it. Worst medical student they had. But I had to complete medical school and psychiatric residency in order to become a psychiatrist. Don’t think I learned much of anything in medical school or psychiatric residency that ever really helped any of my patients at that time. But now I have a life I really enjoy, although there are still negatives I have to put up with. Warmly, david One last thing to add. The boring, trivial work does not upset you. Only your distorted thoughts can upset you. The truth in your thoughts is real but does not upset you. You are saying that you SHOULD NOT have to do trivial boring work. Where did you get that idea. Did you think you were entitled to a universe that conforms to your demands? Why should the world be the way you want it to be? There’s an irritating voice in your brain that keeps telling you that you should have to do this and you shouldn’t have to do that. That voice is your enemy, your source of angst, and not the actual work. So, your first step is to make a decision, perhaps two Cost-Benefit Analyses. The first might be the Advantages and Disadvantages of loudly protesting and insisting it SHOULDN’T be this way. There will be many advantages and a few disadvantages as well. Now balance the Adv against the Dis on a 100 point scale at the bottom, putting the higher number under the column that feels the more desirable or impactful. For example, if the ADV are a lot greater, your two numbers might be 70-30. Then you might do a second CBS listing the Advantages and Disadvantages of ACCEPTING the fact that school often sucks. There may be some advantages and a few disadvantages as well. Now balance the Adv against the Dis on a 100 point scale at the bottom, putting the higher number under the column that feels the more desirable or impactful. For example, if the DIS of acceptance are a lot greater, your two numbers might be 25-75. Send me your two analyses when you’re done! If you come to the unlikely decision that acceptance is preferably to shoulding on yourself, there are lots of strategies that might help. But I’d need to know where you stand first, or the methods would be a waste of time. Anger, unlike most negative feelings, is highly addictive, and most people don’t want to let go of it. You could also do Positive Reframing of your anger and negative thoughts, which is super powerful, but this is getting a bit long. Best, david David follow-up for podcast audience: As far as I can tell, Gray didn’t respond to my email. Sad!

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• 433: Ask David: Anxiety, Depression, Boring Dates, Scary Thoughts

  David, Matt, and Rhonda Answer Your Questions! 1. How can I help my depressed son? 2. What can you do on a boring first date? 3. Are depression and anxiety genetic and hopeless? 4. What do scary, intrusive thoughts mean? The answers to this week’s questions were written by David prior to the podcast. The live discussions will add greatly to the comments below. Get consent on first question, or change name. In fact, I’ll just change her name to Henrietta. Henrietta asks how she can help her son who’s been severely depressed for nearly 20 years and rejects all suggestions. Julia asks what to do on a boring first date. Negar asks if anxiety and depression are genetically caused and therefore hopeless . Negar asks about scary intrusive thoughts. 1. Henrietta asks how she can help her son who’s been severely depressed for nearly 20 years and rejects all suggestions. Dear  Dr David I discovered you years ago due to my son’s depression.   I purchased your book for him, but he not reading it.  He thinks he is too far gone for any self help and has been on anti depressants for years. I appreciate all your hard work , the blogs and the app.   I have my hopes up that one day he will listen to you or download the app.   This depression has been going on more than 18 years now. Do you have any ideas on how I could get him to listen to you on You tube?  God bless you and your team.   Keep  up the good work! Best  regards Henrietta David’s reply Hi Henrietta, I’m so sorry he’s struggling. I do have a clear recommendation, clearly spelled out in the podcast of a couple years ago, “How to help. And how NOT to help.” You can easily find it on the list of podcasts on my website. I’m sure that his depression has been heart-breaking for you. But there is a radically different strategy / direction one can pursue when efforts to “help” are 100% rejected. LMK if I can use your question on an Ask David podcast. Then you’ll get input from several of us. Warmly, david 2. Julia asks what to do on a boring first date. Dear David Just saw that you published a podcast about how to give negative feedback, absolutely cannot wait to listen to it. I’m afraid I fall in the category of people who tend omitting opinions and this is going to be of great help! Now to my question: how do I get more excited in dates with guys ? I would like to date more and have a more active sexual life but I find myself getting bored in dates and this affects also my libido. I will have thoughts like: this is boring he is not that attractive I won’t be turned on sex won’t be good I obviously then don’t end up having sex with the guy and try to have a date with someone else. In the date I don’t feel anxious but I’m not excited physically and mentally. The anxiety plays a role before I go to the next scheduled dates, because with time I start thinking this feeling of boredom will never go away. I have tried to work on the thoughts myself with little results and I was wondering if you had any suggestions on how I could be less bored and anxious and enjoy myself. Thanks you for your answer and your amazing work! Best wishes, Julia David’s Reply Great question, and I have an answer. Can we include this in the next Ask David, using your first name or a fake first name? Thanks, Warmly, david You are viewing dating as a shopping expedition, trying to “find” the best item to purchase, and finding your shopping boring, which it is. But you are forcing it to be boring because you are not being open with your feelings. You are foolishly trying to hide your feelings of boredom, whereas they are really the door to fascination and a most interesting and dynamic exchange. Let me show you what I mean. You can, instead, view dating as forming a relationship, being open, and genuine, and a little flirtatious, and seeing how things unfold. So, or example, you might say something along these lines, “You seem like a really neat and interesting person, but I notice that our conversation is not very open, or vulnerable, and that makes it way less interesting. Have you notice that, too? Tell me how you’re feeling.” If you express this, things will instantly get very interesting! You are not trying to hurt their feelings, but rather open up a conversation about feelings, by encouraging them to be real. They may also be feeling bored, or anxious, or whatever. As a psychiatrist, I find that when I explore the feelings and insecurities of my patients, it is always interesting. And when there is tension, including boredom, I acknowledge it to find out what’s up, and how is my patient experiencing the session and our interaction, and that is interesting 100% of the time, without exception. Warmly, david Dear David, Thank you for such an amazing answer! I have listened to the podcasts so many times and I am familiar with the concept of sharing the tensed feelings like boredom, to not force the other person to be boring. However I had never thought to apply it to dating!! It is such a foreign concept to how all my friends approach dating, that I will need first to experiment with it. I’m curious to see if I’m going to be brave enough to take this leap! Cannot wait to hear the podcast! All the best, Giulia 3. Negar asks if anxiety and depression are genetically caused and therefore hopeless . Hello, my kind father🦋💙, I hope you are well💝. I have a question. Many people I see who suffer from panic attacks and experience anxiety and major depression believe that they have a family and genetic background. That is why they do not have much hope that psychotherapy can help them and believe that the defective gene for causeless anxiety and panic is turned on in the nucleus of their cells. What do you think? Is it possible to deactivate these defective genes with psychotherapy sessions, meditation, etc.?!🥲 David’s Reply There is evidence that anxiety is inherited, and my mother had fear of heights, for example. I also got fear of heights and more than a dozen other forms of anxiety: fear of blood, dogs, vomiting, social situations, public speaking, cameras, panic attack once, and much more. But I have found that the techniques I use in therapy have helped greatly. I got over my fear of blood, for example, in twenty minutes working in the emergency room of a hospital and treating a severe trauma patient covered in blood. Everything about humans is genetic. We are born unable to speak a language, and yet we learn. So, to me, the argument is kind of silly and naïve. Just because something is influenced by genetics, and everything is, how does it follow that we cannot grow and learn? The whole notion seems to me to be ridiculous. Now, there are some genetic things that cannot be changed. For example, how tall you are, or the color of your hair (of course you can dye your hair if you want.) So everything has limits. The belief that you cannot change the way you feel will act as a self-fulfilling prophecy, since you won’t try, but that doesn’t make it true! Here’s something that IS true: Your feelings constantly are changing, at every minute of every day from the moment of birth. So anyone who argues that feelings CANNOT change is just wrapped up in a complete delusion! But people are welcome to believe whatever they want, of course. I believe strongly in freedom of thought. I also believe that people have the RIGHT to be WRONG! Best, david Will use as another excellent Ask David question if okay. Thanks for the great photo. Do you want me to include it in the show notes for that podcast episode? PS I will soon publish a video on my YouTube channel showing a 5 ½ minute cure for a woman with ten years of extreme panic attacks every week. Panic is probably the easiest thing to treat. 4. Negar asks about scary intrusive thoughts. Hello my kind father I hope you are in a good mood and continue to be full of energy as always I had a question I see in some people that they say that we have scary and useless thoughts This case is interesting for me too, because sometimes I have absurd and meaningless thoughts But since I meditate and do mindfulness exercises, I came to the conclusion that these are just thoughts. Did you have such an experience?😉 David’s Reply Yes, I have treated many people with frightening, intrusive thoughts and images, common in OCD / intense anxiety. Often, something is happening in that person’s life that is bothering them, but they are not dealing with itself, instead they sweep their feelings, of anger or whatever, under the rug and try to avoid them. Result = obsessions. There’s a whole section on this in my book, When Panic Attacks, and you can look up my podcasts on the Hidden Emotion Technique. Best, david

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• 432: Finding Humans Less Scary Marathon Returns! Yay!

  Jacob Towery, MD   Michael Luo, MD   Finding Humans Less Scary The 3rd Annual Triumphant Return of the Incredibly Popular and Awesomely Effective Social Anxiety Marathon Two Full Days of Unbelievable-- and Incredibly Cheap-- Help for You!  Featuring Two Super-Shrinks--Drs. Jacob Towery and Michal Luo March 29-30 2025, Palo Alto, California (In-Person Only, No Zoom)  9:30 AM - 5:30 PM Saturday and Sunday Today we interview two eminent and fantastic psychiatrists, Dr. Jacob Towery and Dr. Michael Luo, who describe their upcoming and mind-blowing two-day social anxiety weekend marathon, This intensive experience is dedicated to addressing and drastically reducing feelings of social anxiety. What's that? Social anxiety simply refers to the intense discomfort that so many people struggle with in social situations and interaction's with strangers. This will NOT just be some kind o head trip or motivational talk, but rather a fabulous experiential journey into a new and more confident you! Do you want freedom from your fears? Do you want a new life and a radical shift in your views of other human beings. Do you want great love, more friendships and deeper and more genuine connections? Then this is for you! JUST say YES! How much does it cost, you ask? It cost a great deal in terms of courage and the decision to change your life--but it's ridiculously cheap in terms of $.:All we ask is your $20 donation to one of the charities listed on the website. The location will be secret until you register, but it will be in Palo Alto, California. Seating, as in previous years, will be strictly limited, so ACT FAST to reserve your spot! How does it work? Well, you'll learn and practice many of the popular and powerful TEAM-CBT methods, in real world settings, such as Shame-Attacking Exercises, Smile and Hello Practice, Talk Show Host, Rejection Training, Flirtation Practice, Self-Disclosure, the Survey Technique, and much, much more. Thank you for listening today! Jacob, Michael, Rhonda, and David

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• 431: Screen Addictions, Featuring Brandon Vance, MD

  Overcome Your Screen Addictions! Featuring Dr. Brandon Vance Today we interview Dr. Brandon Vance, the Founder of the wildly popular Feeling Great Book Clubs and many other psychoeducational groups for the general public as well as shrinks. Today, he tells us about his latest group designed for people with the newly named "screen addiction." Dr. Vance formed this group because of many recent research studies suggesting a link between the time spent with social media sites and increased feelings of loneliness and depression in teens and adults. Although correlational studies do not prove causality, many of these studies are compatibles with the hypothesis that excessive time on social media may reduce the quality of moods as well as personal relationships, to say nothing of the potential negative impact on work and productivity. On the podcast he gave examples of how technology has been built into our lives, and how eqsy it is to pick up your cell phone, even in the company of others. However, screen addiction can also involve tlevision binge-watching, video games, and more. We demonstrated an example of the Devil's Advocate Technique, one of many techniques help combat positive thoughts that suck us into screen addictions. For example, Rhonda loves and frequently gets tempted to binge-watch a show on wedding dresses (Say YES to the DRESS), because she tell herself things like this: This is really fun. Would i like that dress? Would it look good on me? Maybe my wedding dress wasn't as pretty. I'll only watch for a minute. I need to relax. This is not hurting anyone. My husband won't mind that I'm gone. I can talk about the dresses to some of my friends. I work night and day and deserve to watch. in the live role-play, 'Rhonda was able to defeat these tempting thoughts "huge." If you think this might describe you, or benefit you, or just be fun and educational, here's the coop about the Screen Addiction Group, as well as his next Feeling Great Book Club and his Five Secrets Deep Practice Group. Free Yourself from Mindless Tech Use (Jan22-Feb26, $180 for 6 hour-long sessions).  Do you get on your phone every time you have a spare second?  Do you think social media will make you happier and yet you feel more lonely or stressed?  Do you stay up late fighting video game zombies and then turn into a zombie the next day because you're so tired? This 6-week online class will teach you powerful Cognitive Behavioral Therapy techniques (such as Self-Monitoring, Triple Paradox and Devil's Advocate) led by Brandon Vance, MD, all within the accountability and support of a group of peers to Free Yourself from Mindless Technology Use. The Feeling Great Book Club (two groups: Feb 24 - May 12 and Feb 26 - May14. $168 for 12 80-minute sessions, sliding scale).  Join together with people all over the world in this popular online class in a book club format, to read the Cognitive Behavioral Therapy book Feeling Great by David Burns, MD, and learn and practice tools to break through depression and anxiety to live a more joyful and relaxed life.  See live expert demos and join smaller breakout groups to practice what you learn in this sliding scale weekly online group. 5 Secrets Deep Practice (Jan 15 - Feb 19th and Mar 5 - Apr 9, $180-480 sliding scale, 6 90-minute sessions).  David Burns, MD laid out 5 key ingredients that make communication highly successful to get closer to each other, even in conflict situations.  Learn to use these 5 Secrets in your own life with expert demos and instruction and 1-1 practice in this 6-week online group. Rhonda and I strongly recommend these groups because active practice is the real key to learning and personal growth The support of others in the group can also lift morale and enhance accountability. If you want to change your life, this is a great option. Dr. Vance is not only a tremendous visionary and teacher, but he also has a huge heart. You'll find that these groups are ridiculously cheep but incredible treasures, and you can also contact him if any group looks appealing but you currently have limited means. Thank you for joining us today! Warmly, Rhonda, Brandon, and David

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• 430: Was Epictetus Right? Finally--an Answer!

  Do Negative Thoughts REALLY Cause Depression? An Answer--At Last!--from Research Featuring David Burns, Jeremy Karmel, Diane Spangler and Rhonda Barovsky Today, David and two dear colleagues--Jeremy Karmel, CEO of the Feeling Great Corporation, and Dr. Diane Spangler--share the amazing results of two types of research on the Feeling Great app that focus on two related and vitally important questions: How effective is the Feeling Great app? Research confirms it triggers incredibly fast and dramatic reductions in seven negative feelings: depression, anxiety, guil7, inadequacy, loneliness, hopelessness and anger. The speed and depth of these effects may substantially outstrip human therapists as well as antidepressant medications. How does it work?  What is the mechanism of action? People have argued intensely about the chicken vs the egg problem for more than 2,000 years. Do negative thoughts REALLY cause negative feelings? Or do negative feelings cause negative thoughts? Or both? Or neither? The answers are exciting! Warmly,. Rhonda, Jeremy, Diane, and David

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