Good Life Project

What if excellence isn’t about winning, but becoming?

For so many of us, the word excellence has become tangled up with perfectionism, obsession, and relentless hustle. No wonder it feels heavy, triggering, or out of reach.

In this conversation, we explore a very different understanding of excellence, one rooted in meaning, care, and deep engagement. Together, we unpack why modern life makes it so hard to focus, why joy and rest are essential to growth, and how pursuing what truly matters can quietly reshape who you become.

Brad Stulberg is a bestselling author, writer for The New York Times and Wall Street Journal, co-host of the podcast Excellence, Actually, and faculty member at the University of Michigan. His newest book is The Way of Excellence: A Guide to True Greatness and Deep Satisfaction in a Chaotic World.

In this episode, you’ll discover
A powerful redefinition of excellence that frees you from perfectionism
Why mastery and mattering are essential for deep satisfaction
A simple way to reclaim focus in a world designed to distract you
How joy, rest, and renewal fuel long-term growth
A practical framework for balancing ambition with the rest of your life

If you’ve ever felt pulled to do meaningful work but exhausted by the way success is usually framed, this conversation offers a wiser, more human path forward. Press play to explore what excellence can become.

You can find Brad at: Website | LinkedIn | Episode Transcript

Next week, be sure to tune in for my conversation with Susan Piver about why love feels hard and how that discomfort can deepen intimacy. Follow the show in your favorite listening app so it’s right there when the episode drops.

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When life upends everything, what still matters?

When the future you assumed disappears, the questions get sharper. This conversation explores how meaning, values, and hope evolve when time feels uncertain and life breaks open in unexpected ways.

In this deeply human and reflective episode, Jonathan Fields sits down with Lucy Kalanithi, a physician, storyteller, and Clinical Associate Professor of Medicine at Stanford University. She is the widow of neurosurgeon and writer Paul Kalanithi, author of the #1 New York Times bestseller When Breath Becomes Air, for which Lucy wrote the unforgettable epilogue.

Together, they explore what it means to live honestly in the presence of mortality, how our sense of time and identity shifts through loss, and how values can guide choices when certainty is gone.

In this episode, you’ll discover:
A simple but profound way to make decisions when the future feels unclear
How redefining hope can ease fear without denying reality
Why you cannot have everything, and how that clarity can be freeing
A humane framework for navigating medical and life decisions
What it really means to build a life that fits who you are

When life changes in ways you never expected, clarity does not come from control. It comes from listening more closely. Press play to explore what truly matters, and how to live with intention even when the path ahead is uncertain.

You can find Lucy at: Website | Episode Transcript

Next week, be sure to tune in for my conversation with Brad Stulberg about what excellence really is, and how pursuing it can help you feel more alive, not burned out. And don’t forget to follow the show in your favorite listening app.

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You can be deeply loved and still feel alone, even when your life is filled with people who care about you.

Many of us assume that love automatically translates into feeling loved. But research shows that isn’t how it works. In this conversation, we explore why connection can be present, yet the feeling of being loved never quite lands and what actually helps close that gap.

My guest is Harry Reis, a longtime researcher of close relationships and professor of psychology whose work has shaped how we understand intimacy, attachment, and emotional connection. He’s the co-author of How to Feel Loved: The Five Mindsets That Get You More of What Matters Most.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• A powerful relational dynamic that quietly determines whether love is felt or missed
• The subtle reason giving more doesn’t always lead to feeling more connected
• A listening shift that dramatically deepens intimacy without forcing vulnerability
• Why being fully known matters more than being widely liked
• The mindset that helps love feel genuine instead of performative

If you’ve ever wondered why closeness feels harder than it should or why love doesn’t always register even when it’s present, this conversation offers clarity, compassion, and practical insight. Press play to learn what actually helps love land.

You can find Harry at: Website | Harry's Bio | Episode Transcript

Next week, be sure to tune in for my conversation with Lucy Kalanithi about what still matters when certainty disappears.

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What if chronic pain was caused by faulty wiring in your brain?

And that one shift in understanding can open the door to relief many people never thought was possible.

Chronic pain affects tens of millions, disrupts relationships, limits work, and quietly erodes joy. Yet for many, scans, surgeries, and medications never bring lasting relief. In this conversation, we explore why pain can persist long after the body has healed and what helps the brain finally stand down.

My guest is Yoni K. Ashar, PhD, assistant professor at the University of Colorado Anschutz Medical Campus and director of the Pain and Emotion Research Laboratory. His research uses brain imaging and clinical neuroscience to study chronic pain recovery, with a focus on Pain Reprocessing Therapy.

In this episode, you’ll learn
A key signal that reveals when pain is driven by the brain, not injury
A simple shift that helps interrupt the pain–fear cycle
Why imaging findings can distract from the true source of pain
How the right kind of gradual exposure retrains the brain to feel safe again
What decades of pain research reveal about lasting recovery
Why we’ve gotten pain wrong for so long, and how to get it right

If you’ve tried everything and still hurt, this conversation may offer a new way to understand your pain and a path toward relief. Press play to learn how unlearning pain may be possible.

You can find Yoni at: Website | Episode Transcript

Next week, we're sharing a really meaningful conversation with Harry Reis about why love doesn't always land, even when it's real.

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You could be having better sex and the science explains why, not because you’re broken or doing something wrong, but because most of us were never taught how desire actually works or how intimacy evolves over time. Instead, we’re handed myths, silence, and a lot of quiet frustration.

In this conversation, we explore why great sex is not something that just happens, but something you can learn, practice, and grow into at any stage of life. We talk about desire, pleasure, communication, midlife shifts, and how letting go of shame opens the door to intimacy that feels more alive, connected, and satisfying.

Dr. Nicole McNichols is an internationally renowned human sexuality professor at the University of Washington, where her course The Diversity of Human Sexuality is the most popular in the school’s history. She is also the author of You Could Be Having Better Sex, out February 3.

In this episode, you’ll discover
A simple mindset shift that makes sex more fulfilling over time
Why novelty matters more than frequency and how to add it without pressure
The overlooked role pleasure plays in mental health and resilience
What actually helps desire return in long-term relationships
A healthier way to talk about sex that builds trust and connection

If sex has started to feel confusing, disconnected, or quietly disappointing, this episode offers a grounded, research-backed way forward. Press play to learn how intimacy can become something you grow into rather than drift away from.

You can find Nicole at: Website | Instagram | Episode Transcript

If you LOVED this episode, you’ll also love the conversations we had with Emily Nagoski about the science of pleasure and sustaining sexual connection.

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Join My New Writing Project: Awake at the Wheel
Visit Our Sponsor Page For Great Resources & Discount Codes
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