what happens if they ask how they can help, then don't like my answer?
A listener sent us a video that hit a nerve: a husband asks his overwhelmed wife how he can help, then resists the very thing she asks for. In this episode, we unpack what’s really going on in moments like these. We talk about the emotional weight of asking for help, the nuances of saying no, and what it costs when a partner responds with resistance(even subtly). Emotional labor, the mental load, relationship dynamics, viral couples videos... it's all here!Mentioned in this episode:Rage Becomes HerWages For HouseworkNo More MediocreGet resources, ad-free episodes, and more at timetoleanpod.substack.comPreorder No More Mediocre: A Call To Reimagine Our Relationships And Demand MoreFollow Laura: @thatdarnchat | thatdarnchat.substack.comFollow Crystal: @itscrystalbritt | itscrystalbritt.substack.comSubscribe, rate, and share to help others find the showIf you or someone you know needs support: The National Domestic Violence Hotline | 800-799-7233 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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53:52
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53:52
if i step back, let him “rise” to leadership, and comment HUBBY on this post, will my partner finally make his own damn list?
This week, we look at a viral influencer’s take on why men don’t step up at home. He's just one of many creators who exist in the genre of “relationship advice” whose content insidiously blames women for their partner’s lack of initiative. Apparently, the problem with a lack of effort isn't... the lack of effort... It's that you must be smothering his divine masculine spark.Mentioned in this episode:Rage Becomes Her by Soraya ChemalyBoyMom by Ruth WhippmanErased by Anna Malaika TubbsThe Future Is Disabled by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna SamarasinhaCare Work by Leah Lakshmi Piepzna SamarasinhaSubscribe, rate, and follow us:@timetoleanpod | timetoleanpod.substack.com@thatdarnchat | thatdarnchat.substack.com@itscrystalbritt | itscrystalbritt.substack.comPreorder No More Mediocre: A Call to Reimagine Our Relationships And Demand MoreNeed support? Visit thehotline.org Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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1:12:29
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1:12:29
am i the a-hole for making us late when i was doing all the housework?
This week Crystal and Laura discuss the challenges of care work, societal expectations of default partners, and the internet's attempts at poking fun at these dynamics. Spoiler alert: we don't think it's funny. We analyze a viral video that pokes fun at a woman managing her family's needs while being late, highlighting the unfairness of couples comedy posts. Instead of trying to punch down, shouldn't we be trying to emphasize the importance of recognizing the value of care work, questioning societal norms, and teaching children about responsibility and empathy?Mentioned in This Episode:Our Home by Lori Sugarman-Li, a childrens book on domestic equity!If you'd like to listen to us AD FREE, subscribe to us on Substack! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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51:55
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51:55
what if i know you're going to mess it up?
In this episode, Laura and Crystal discuss planning ahead when one partner takes on a new task--should you make contingency plans just in case they mess it up? Mentioned in This Episode:Fight Right by the GottmansLike what you hear? Join the conversation on Substack! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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44:12
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44:12
what if we went to couples therapy?
In this episode, Laura and Crystal discuss a clip from the popular Showtime show, “Couples Therapy,” where a pair of clients discuss incompetence, ability, and blame.Disclaimer:Time to Lean is an educational and conversational podcast intended for informational and entertainment purposes only. The views expressed by the hosts and guests are their own and do not constitute therapeutic advice, clinical guidance, or a substitute for professional mental health care. While we speak from lived experience and professional backgrounds, we’re not your therapists—and this podcast is not therapy.Please consult a qualified mental health provider if you’re experiencing distress or need individualized support. And remember: systemic change takes all of us, but you don’t have to do it all alone. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
On the Time to Lean podcast with Laura Danger and Crystal Britt, we dig into the often-overlooked realities of domestic labor, care work, and household inequity. Through sharp cultural critiques and discussions on trending topics, we explore the systemic issues that shape our homes and lives. In each weekly episode, we tackle the topics that impact our lives, challenge the status quo, and uncover the hidden dynamics that influence how we live and work. Join us as we make time to lean into these crucial conversations and advocate for the value of the work that truly keeps the world turning.Laura, @thatdarnchat, is an educator and advocate. Crystal Britt, @itscrystalbritt, is a coach and licensed therapist in California. Find us on IG or join us on Patreon @ timetoleanpod for Ad-Free episodes, resources, book clubs, weekly virtual meet-ups and so much more!Check us out on Substack for Ad-Free episodes and supplemental resources! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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