Office Hours with Arthur Brooks

When something hurts, our first instinct is to make it stop. But what if stopping it makes us suffer more?  In this episode of Office Hours, I'm joined by Dr. Christopher Good, a pioneering spine surgeon and president and CEO of VSI. 
We discuss what he's learned from a career treating back pain, one of the most common sources of chronic pain. He shares how he helps patients set realistic goals and why managing pain requires both acceptance and action. As always, we give practical steps to live fulfilling lives even when some pain remains, and how to use that pain for good.
***
Are you interested in helping others through the science of happiness? I have a new three-day program—⁠learn more here⁠.
—
Brought to you by:
• Noble Mobile—With Noble, there is only one plan: The No-Bull Plan. It’s simple. It’s transparent. And if you use less data, you get cash back. Get an exclusive offer at: https://noblemobile.com/arthurbrooks.
—
Where to find Dr. Christopher Good:
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/VirginiaSpineInstitute 
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drchristopher-good 
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.chris_good 
• Website: https://linktr.ee/dr_good

Where to find Arthur Brooks: 
• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• In-person Retreats: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://retreats.arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
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—
Timestamps:
(00:00) Intro
(05:00) The problem with Aristippus’s philosophy on pleasure and pain
(13:15) Pain and the fear-avoidance model
(17:07) The two kinds of pain
(19:41) Wisdom from Buddhism on suffering vs. pain
(22:44) Learning to accept pain
(25:34) Introducing Dr. Christopher Good
(27:38) Dr. Good’s background in spine care
(30:47) How Dr. Good’s father’s injury sparked his interest in spine care
(35:51) Why back pain is so common
(38:30) Dr. Good’s approach to helping patients set realistic goals
(42:50) The biopsychosocial model of medicine
(45:26) How Dr. Good’s work has changed him
(50:10) The importance of pairing acceptance with agency
(58:44) Lessons from pain management for our relationships
(1:01:52) Dr. Good’s plans for aging well
(1:07:29) Q&A: Finding happiness while dealing with health problems
(1:09:01) Q&A: Supporting a loved one with severe chronic pain
(1:11:12) 5 big lessons from the conversation
—
Referenced:
• The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness: themeaningofyourlife.com
• Arthur’s newsletter: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter 
• The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale 
• Anhedonia: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/25155-anhedonia
• Pleasure systems in the brain: linkinghub.elsevier.com/retrieve/pii/S0896627315001336 
• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

When I was a kid, I loved Halloween—I mean who doesn’t love candy and dressing up for a night? It turns out, October 31 is not the only day we wear a disguise. Today, I’m talking about the masks we wear the other 364 days of the year. 
In this episode of Office Hours, I explore the psychology behind why we wear masks in our daily lives and the emotional cost of hiding our feelings. More importantly, I share three ways we can take off the mask and live more honestly, so that we can give and receive the love we need most.
***
Are you interested in helping others through the science of happiness? I have a new three-day program—learn more here.
—
Brought to you by:
• LMNT—A science-backed electrolyte drink mix that helps you feel and perform your best, without sugar, artificial ingredients, or gimmicks. Get a free sample pack at DrinkLMNT.com/Arthur 
—
Where to find Arthur Brooks: 
• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• In-person Retreats: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://retreats.arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
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—
Timestamps:
(00:00) Intro
(12:17) Activation vs. inhibition 
(14:22) When masking becomes a problem
(25:10) Why honesty matters more than avoiding conflict
(27:48) #1. Take a break from yourself
(31:19) #2. Take your mask off around loved ones
(34:07) #3. Make sure you like what’s behind the mask
(37:29) Q&A: The difference between satisfaction and happiness 
(38:59) Q&A: Coping with disappointment 
(41:07) Q&A: Reconciling belief in God with suffering
—
Referenced:
• The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness: themeaningofyourlife.com
• Arthur’s newsletter: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter 
• The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale 
• The Pursuit of Happiness with Arthur Brooks: https://www.thefp.com/s/the-pursuit-of-happiness-with-arthur
• Maskenfreiheit: https://www.dwds.de/wb/Maskenfreiheit 
• Develop Authenticity: 20 Ways to Be a More Authentic Person: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/click-here-for-happiness/201904/develop-authenticity-20-ways-to-be-a-more-authentic-person
• George F. Will: https://www.washingtonpost.com/people/george-f-will/ 
• Pan Am Smile: https://www.talkspace.com/blog/the-7-types-of-smiles-and-how-people-perceive-them/ 
• Not all smiles are created equal: the differences between enjoyment and nonenjoyment smiles: https://www.degruyterbrill.com/document/doi/10.1515/humr.1993.6.1.9/html
• Smiling with Your Eyes: What Exactly Is a Duchenne Smile?: https://www.healthline.com/health/duchenne-smile
• Cultural differences in the production of emotional facial expressions: a review: https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2026.1699374/full
• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

We all know how important sleep is for our health and happiness. So why do we resist going to bed, even when we know we should?
In this episode of Office Hours, I explore the science of sleep and how it affects our well-being. I explain why we sometimes sacrifice sleep for a little extra time to ourselves, a phenomenon known as "revenge bedtime procrastination," and what it reveals about our need for control. I also share two ways to change your relationship with sleep, along with my own nightly routine.
—
Brought to you by:
• Noble Mobile—With Noble, there is only one plan: The No-Bull Plan. It’s simple. It’s transparent. And if you use less data, you get cash back. Get an exclusive offer at: https://noblemobile.com/arthurbrooks.
—
Where to find Arthur Brooks: 
• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• In-person Retreats: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://retreats.arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
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—
Timestamps:
(00:00) Intro
(05:42) The sleep deprivation epidemic
(08:27) How sleep affects your health and well-being
(13:46) Four common barriers to sleep
(15:58) Bedtime procrastination
(19:22) Revenge bedtime procrastination 
(24:22) #1. Quell your inner tyrant
(28:42) #2. Go from physical to metaphysical 
(36:14) My personal sleep routine
(41:33) Q&A: Dealing with shifting ambition 
(42:34) Q&A: Why men struggle more with friendship than women
—
Referenced:
• The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness: themeaningofyourlife.com
• Arthur’s newsletter: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter 
• The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale 
• Retreats: https://retreats.arthurbrooks.com
• Huberman Lab: https://www.hubermanlab.com
• About Sleep: https://www.cdc.gov/sleep/about/index.html
• Changes in Sleep Duration, Quality, and Medication Use Are Prospectively Associated With Health and Well-being: Analysis of the UK Household Longitudinal Study: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28364423
• The role of sleep in cognition and emotion: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19338508
• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

If you struggle with anxiety, you might wish you could get rid of it altogether. But your brain’s alarm system exists for a reason. The trouble is that the way we live today can set it off far more often than it should.
In this episode of Office Hours, I break down what anxiety actually is and what chronic anxiety does to your body. The key is understanding when anxiety is hurting us and when it can help us. I share three simple but powerful strategies to manage your anxiety and create more opportunities for happiness, adventure, and meaning in your life.
—
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• Noble Mobile—With Noble, there is only one plan: The No-Bull Plan. It’s simple. It’s transparent. And if you use less data, you get cash back. Get an exclusive offer at: https://noblemobile.com/arthurbrooks.
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Where to find Arthur Brooks: 
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Timestamps:
(00:00) Intro
(07:36) What anxiety is 
(12:07) Why we need anxiety and when it becomes too much
(16:00) Why anxiety is rising among young people
(17:08) What devices do to your brain
(23:05) Why trying to eliminate anxiety falls short
(26:36) Some positives of anxiety 
(31:08) #1: Accept your anxiety
(33:37) #2: Reframe your anxiety
(36:01) #3: Lean into the source of your anxiety
(41:29) Q&A: Struggling with addiction as a Poet PANAS type 
(44:57) Q&A: Modifying protocols for your health and lifestyle 
(47:08) Q&A: The value of daydreaming
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Referenced:
• The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/the-meaning-of-your-life 
• Meaning Membership: https://hub.arthurbrooks.com/the-meaning-membership 
• Arthur’s newsletter: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter 
• The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale 
• The Pursuit of Happiness with Arthur Brooks: https://www.thefp.com/s/the-pursuit-of-happiness-with-arthur
• Marines on Netflix: https://www.netflix.com/title/81750378
• Søren Kierkegaard: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/S%C3%B8ren_Kierkegaard
• Surviving Anxiety: https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2014/01/surviving_anxiety/355741
• Trends in anxiety among adults in the United States, 2008-2018: Rapid increases among young adults: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32905958
• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Are painful memories keeping you from enjoying your life today? Maybe you avoid a particular place or person because of an experience you can’t seem to let go of.
In this episode of Office Hours, I explore how memory works, why our recollections are less reliable than we think, and how the past shapes the future we imagine. As always, I share practical steps to help you find more happiness, meaning, and gratitude as you move forward.
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Brought to you by:
• Noble Mobile—With Noble, there is only one plan: The No-Bull Plan. It’s simple. It’s transparent. And if you use less data, you get cash back. Get an exclusive offer at: https://noblemobile.com/arthurbrooks.
• Magic Mind—Magic Mind is a mental performance shot with vitamins and clinically-backed ingredients like Ashwagandha and Lion’s Mane for a sharper mind and sustained energy. Get 50% off your first order at magicmind.com.
—
Where to find Arthur Brooks: 
• Website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• In-person Retreats: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://retreats.arthurbrooks.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Newsletter: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
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Timestamps:
(00:00) Intro
(09:21) The science of human memory
(19:09) Why memories are unreliable
(23:09) Why memories shift 
(30:03) #1. To reconstruct your past: Keep a database of positive memories
(34:22) #2. Focus on gratitude 
(35:50) #3. Look for meaning and learning 
(43:00) Q&A: Teaching lessons from The Meaning of Your Life to kids
(43:58) Q&A: Handling uncertainty about AI replacing jobs
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Referenced:
• The Meaning of Your Life: Finding Purpose in an Age of Emptiness:https://www.arthurbrooks.com/the-meaning-of-your-life 
• Arthur’s newsletter: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/newsletter 
• The Happiness Scale: https://learn.arthurbrooks.com/the-happiness-scale 
• The Pursuit of Happiness with Arthur Brooks: https://www.thefp.com/s/the-pursuit-of-happiness-with-arthur
• Self-Reliance: https://nationalhumanitiescenter.org/pds/triumphnationalism/cman/text8/selfreliance.pdf
• Remembering the past to imagine the future: the prospective brain: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/17700624
• Phantom flashbulbs: False recollections of hearing the news about Challenger: https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1993-97049-001
• You Won’t Remember the Pandemic the Way You Think You Will: https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2021/05/how-will-we-remember-covid-19-pandemic/618397
• Emotion and memory research: A grumpy overview: https://guilfordjournals.com/doi/10.1521/soco.22.5.530.50767
• Memories affect mood: evidence from covert experimental assignment to positive, neutral, and negative memory recall: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/16945317
• PANAS quiz: https://www.arthurbrooks.com/panas

• ...References continued at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.arthurbrooks.com/office-hours⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠