Coaching for Leaders

• 734: The Path to More Joy in Work and Life, with Judith Joseph

  Judith Joseph: High Functioning Judith Joseph is a Columbia-trained psychiatrist and the founder of and chief investigator at Manhattan Behavioral Medicine, New York City’s premier clinical research site. She’s also a clinical assistant professor in child and adolescent psychiatry at NYU Langone Medical Center in Manhattan, and chairwoman of the Women in Medicine Board at Columbia University’s Vagelos College of Physicians and Surgeons. She is the author of High Functioning: Overcome Your Hidden Depression and Reclaim Your Joy*. When we think about successful leaders, we often admire those who are loving towards others, can tolerate painful times, and know how to delay gratification. Those are all such important traits – and when we overindex on them, can become counter-productive. In this conversation, (Judith and I explore) when it’s no longer working and how to find the joy again. Key Points Many people who are experiencing high-functioning depression don’t realize it. High-functioning depression is often triggering by trauma. That can can be major trauma, but it can also be more common forms of trauma like divorce, workplace conflict, legal issues, and many more. Anhedonia is one of the most common ways high-functioning depression reveals itself. It looks like not seeking out joyful activities and also not experiencing joy in activities that used to bring joy. Masochism is the other common way high-functioning depression shows up. It manifests as a pattern of self-defeating, people-pleasing behavior. The “superpowers” that come with high-functioning depression are viewed by others and society as strengths. However, over-indexing on being loving, tolerating pain, and delayed gratification are counter-productive over time. Validation is a starting point for healing. Each person is unique and sometimes it’s helpful to begin with movies or other creative works that help you recognize yourself. Resources Mentioned High Functioning: Overcome Your Hidden Depression and Reclaim Your Joy* by Judith Joseph Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes What to Do With Your Feelings, with Lori Gottlieb (episode 438) The Mindset Leaders Need to Address Burnout, with Christina Maslach (episode 608) Transcend Leadership Struggles Through Your Strengths, with Lisa Cummings (episode 692) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

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• 733: The Way to Notice People Better, with Zach Mercurio

  Zach Mercurio: The Power of Mattering Zach Mercurio is an author, researcher, and speaker specializing in purposeful leadership, mattering, meaningful work, and positive organizational psychology. He teaches a course with past guest Simon Sinek on how leaders can show everyone how they matter. He is the author of The Power of Mattering: How Leaders Can Create a Culture of Significance*. When you ask people what mattered in their careers, few cite the bonus, or the stock options, or the employee of the month award. What they do talk about are the times they were remembered, supported, thanked, and seen. In this conversation, Zach and I discuss how to do that better. Key Points When people are asked about when they mattered, they recall small moments of being remembered, helped, thanked, or seen. The behavior of a leader accounts for half of the increased feelings of mattering and meaningfulness at work. Rather than identifying with a person’s behavior, identify first with the person. Look for the positive traits in a person or identify something that you love. Music is the space between the notes. In our informal interactions, we have the choice to turn against, turn away, or turn towards. Leaders who notice people well consistently follow three steps: observe, note, and share. Resources Mentioned The Power of Mattering: How Leaders Can Create a Culture of Significance* by Zach Mercurio Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes Start With Why, with Simon Sinek (episode 223) How to Shift Behavior for Better Results, with Mitch Warner (episode 690) How to Bring Out the Best in People, with Donna Hicks (episode 724) Expert Partner Are you noticing people communicating in such a way that feels boring or robotic to stakeholders – or perhaps just losing them in the data? David Hutchens, one of our expert partners, helps leaders and organizations develop a more human, engaging voice through the power of storytelling. To discover more about how his work may support your organization, get in touch on our expert partners page. Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

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• 732: How to Find What’s Missing, with Jeff Wetzler

  Jeff Wetzler: Ask Jeff Wetzler is co-Founder of Transcend, a nationally recognized innovation organization, and an expert in learning and human potential. His experience spans 25+ years in business and education, as a management consultant to top corporations, a learning facilitator for leaders, and as Chief Learning Officer at Teach For America. He's the author of Ask: Tap Into the Hidden Wisdom of People Around You for Unexpected Breakthroughs in Leadership and Life*. We place our organizations at risk when we miss stuff. Often, the things we miss aren’t what we don’t know. Instead, they are the assumptions we don’t even question. In this conversation, Jeff and I explore the practices that work to find what’s missing. Key Points Hidden feedback cues: Repeated questions or suggestions about seemingly small details. Increased involvement in tactical decisions. Unexpected decreases in engagement. Benefits of curiosity: When We’re Curious About People, They Like Us More Curiosity begets curiosity. Curiosity creates empathy. Curiosity makes us more resilient. Curiosity sparks: What might I be missing? How else might someone interpret the situation? How might I be impacting them? What can I learn from this person? Resources Mentioned Ask: Tap Into the Hidden Wisdom of People Around You for Unexpected Breakthroughs in Leadership and Life* by Jeff Wetzler Ask Approach How to Recognize “Hidden Feedback” (Harvard Business Review) by Jeff Wetzler The Curiosity Coach In Your Pocket (Psychology Today) by Jeff Wetzler Related Episodes How to Inspire More Curiosity, with Shannon Minifie (episode 520) How to Help Others Be Seen and Heard, with Scott Shigeoka (episode 654) Make it Easier to Discuss Hard Things, with Jeff Wetzler (episode 679) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

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• 731: What to Do After a Layoff, with Scott Anthony Barlow

  Scott Anthony Barlow: Happen to Your Career Scott Anthony Barlow is CEO of Happen To Your Career and host of the Happen to Your Career podcast. His team and him are focused on helping people find the work they love. He’s also the author of the book, Happen to Your Career: An Unconventional Approach to Career Change and Meaningful Work*. You’ve been laid off, or someone close to you is navigating that reality right now. A lot of the first things we think to do after a layoff are wrong. In this episode, Scott and I explore what to avoid…and more importantly, where to begin anew. Key Points Most people underestimate the time it takes to make a transition to the next, right position. Submitting tons of applications, networking everywhere, and telling everyone that you’re looking feels productive, but is often either incomplete or a waste of time. Give yourself the space to grieve. Spend time with the people who care about you. This didn’t happen to you, it happened for you. Whether objectively true or not, this mindset will help you be intentional about next actions. Hyperfocus your targeting by creating a master resume and also considering backdoors to opportunities. Decide when to hire help by using math – how much will expertise help speed up the process and/or help you land a higher salary? Resources Mentioned Happen to Your Career: An Unconventional Approach to Career Change and Meaningful Work* by Scott Anthony Barlow Interview Notes Download my interview notes in PDF format (free membership required). Related Episodes Craft a Career to Fit Your Strengths, with Scott Anthony Barlow (episode 424) How to Nail a Job Transition, with Sukhinder Singh Cassidy (episode 555) How to Respond When You Get Triggered, with Sally Helgesen (episode 620) Expert Partner In this midst of a layoff? Feeling stagnant in your current role? Scott Barlow and his team may be able to help as official partners of Coaching for Leaders. To discover more about how his team can support you, get in touch on our expert partners page. Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

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• 730: How to Take Initiative, with Tom Henschel

  Tom Henschel: The Look & Sound of Leadership Tom Henschel of Essential Communications supports senior leaders and executive teams. An internationally recognized expert in the field of workplace communications and self-presentation, he has helped thousands of leaders achieve excellence through his work as an executive coach and his top-rated podcast, The Look & Sound of Leadership. Have you been told you should take more initiative? Or, perhaps you’ve been telling that to someone else? Either way, this conversation with Tom Henschel will outline three key steps to help you get started. Key Points Three steps to taking more initiative: Think and talk about your work. Ideas come through conversation. Execute on your idea. Feel the fear and do it anyway. Communicate what you’ve done. Initiative is often in the eye of the beholder. Imagine a scale that goes from bold to cautious. There’s probably room for you to be at least 5% bolder. Feeling like you are waiting on others may be an indicator to take initiative. To calibrate where you land, ask yourself: “What’s my typical pattern?” In correspondence, consider asking fewer questions and making more statements. Place yourself in situations where you’ll need to show initiative. Resources Mentioned The Look & Sound of Leadership podcast by Tom Henschel Feel the Fear…and Do It Anyway* by Susan Jeffers Related Episodes Leadership vs. Management (The Look & Sound of Leadership, episode 166) 5 Strategies for Dealing with Narcissists (The Look & Sound of Leadership, episode 239) How to Answer “Tell Us About Yourself” (The Look & Sound of Leadership, episode 250) How to Talk So People Understand You (The Look & Sound of Leadership, episode 254) Discover More Activate your free membership for full access to the entire library of interviews since 2011, searchable by topic. To accelerate your learning, uncover more inside Coaching for Leaders Plus.

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