Mother Mayhem: For Daughters of Narcissistic or Emotionally Limited Mothers

Have you ever noticed that you feel worse after seeing or talking to your mother? More anxious, irritable, shut down, flooded, or exhausted? If so, this episode is for you.
In this episode, I break down why your body and nervous system may flare up after contact with your mother, especially after you’ve done some healing work. We talk about why this reaction is not regression, not weakness, and not a sign that you’re doing anything wrong. Often, it’s a sign that your nervous system is more awake, more honest, and less willing to dissociate in order to survive.
You’ll learn how loosening a boundary with good intentions can still lead to nervous system dysregulation, why going back to old dynamics can feel harder once you see them clearly, and how your body responds when it’s holding two truths at the same time: “I used to survive this” and “I no longer should have to.”
I also walk you through how to tell whether you’re in intense dysregulation, more regulated, or living in the messy middle, and what actually helps in each state. Instead of forcing clarity or rushing into action, we focus on becoming a better friend to your nervous system and responding to what it’s truly asking for.
This episode is for daughters who feel confused by their reactions, frustrated by their bodies, or worried that healing is making things harder. There’s nothing wrong here. Your nervous system is simply doing exactly what it was designed to do.
Key takeaway: We don’t rush nervous systems into clarity. We earn their trust first.
Resources & Support: If you’re a member of the Mayhem Daughters community, you’ll find a companion post and worksheet inside The Work to help you walk through this in real time. If you’re not yet inside the community, you can learn more at MayhemDaughters.com

When healing reaches a point of no return, trauma brain often turns on you.
This week, we’re unpacking why daughters of narcissistic or emotionally limited mothers default to self-blame and guilt even when the truth is clear. You may intellectually know that your mother was incapable of showing up differently, and still find yourself wondering, What if it was me? or Why do I feel so guilty now?
This episode breaks down the nervous system logic behind self-blame and guilt, explaining why these responses are not signs that you’re wrong, weak, or confused, but signs of a system shaped by survival, loyalty, and conditioning.
We’ll walk through what “doing the work” actually looks like when guilt and self-blame are running the show. We’ll have grounded practices and journaling invitations for daughters at different stages of healing, whether you’re feeling deeply dysregulated or you’ve been around the block and still get pulled back into old patterns.
This episode is part of a larger arc inside Mayhem focused on learning how to stand with yourself, trust your wise mind, and stop turning on yourself when healing gets real.
Join Mayhem Daughters: MayhemDaughters.com/community

If you were raised by a covert narcissistic mother, your memory was not the problem. The label was. Daughters often reach for the word “covert” because the other word feels too big. Narcissist feels like an accusation. Covert feels softer. But calling it covert often waters down your own reality. It shifts the focus away from what happened and toward whether you misread the signs. It turns the daughter into the unreliable narrator of her own life.
This episode is here to help you stop softening the story so the story can finally make sense.
Today we talk about why daughters of covert narcissists struggle with remembering what happened, why they doubt their own perception, and why so much of the abuse feels blurry even when the impact is crystal clear. We look at how loyalty, silence, emotional attunement, and caretaking turn into survival patterns that protect the child and confuse the adult.
Then we help you reframe what “covert” really means. Because most of what gets labeled covert was actually happening in plain sight. Your body noticed. Your emotions noticed. The tension noticed. The exhaustion noticed. The numbness noticed. The only thing that did not notice was the part of you that had to stay loyal.
This is a conversation for daughters who have spent years wondering why they cannot remember the details but cannot escape the feelings. You are not unreliable. You are not dramatic. You were adapting.
If you grew up with a covert narcissistic mother, this is the episode I wish I had done ages ago.And you don’t have to heal alone. Find us: MayhemDaughters.com

This episode is for daughters who feel overwhelmed by New Year’s pressure…the daughters who grew up with narcissistic, emotionally limited, unpredictable, or inconsistent mothers and now find themselves feeling “behind,” dysregulated, or unsure of how to begin a new year. If traditional New Year’s messages like fresh start, new year, new you, or reinvent yourself feel activating or shaming, this conversation will make sense of why.
In this episode, we’ll talk about why New Year’s Eve hits differently for daughters of narcissistic mothers and mothers with personality disorders or emotional immaturity. We talk about the impact of growing up with chronic vigilance, criticism, dismissal, and role-reversal  and how those early patterns shape a daughter’s nervous system, sense of self, and relationship to change.
Instead of chasing a reinvention, this episode introduces a new way forward for 2026: becoming your own best friend.
I’ll talk about what it means to build a compassionate, trusting relationship with yourself…one where you stop abandoning yourself, overriding your body, performing for approval, or outsourcing your intuition. You’ll hear a clear, trauma-informed explanation of why self-loyalty is the foundation for healing the mother wound, repairing your nervous system, setting boundaries, and breaking generational patterns.
We talk about:
Why healing isn’t about reinvention. it’s about self-trust, presence, and nervous system safetyHow tiny, compassionate shifts create real, sustainable healingThe movement we are building together inside Mayhem Daughters: a year of becoming your own best friend

If you’re ready for a New Year that isn’t built on shame, resolutions, or self-criticism, but on trauma-informed growth, nervous system regulation, and becoming someone you stay with, START HERE and then find us over at MayhemDaughters.com to join our groups or online community

This episode is for daughters who find themselves in a tender moment… the ones who feel like they’ve done so much healing and still hurt, the ones who set boundaries and are now sitting with the loneliness, the ones who expected to feel “further along” by now, and the ones who secretly wonder if they’re ever going to feel better.
Today, we talk honestly about what healing actually looks like for daughters of narcissistic and emotionally limited mothers. Spoiler: it’s not linear, it’s not glamorous, and it doesn’t come from insight alone. Healing happens through the body, through the nervous system, through the small, steady acts of staying with yourself instead of abandoning yourself.
I share the truths I’ve seen in you this year: your courage, your honesty, your protectiveness, your tenderness, and how these qualities point to a future that already belongs to you, even if you can’t fully feel it yet.
We also look ahead to the work we’ll be doing together this coming year, anchored in one central theme: becoming a better friend to yourself. Not a new you. Not a fixed you. A kinder, safer, more loyal relationship with the person you wake up as every day.
If you need grounding, reassurance, truth, or company on the path, we’ve got you.And if you want more Mayhem in your life through group or our online community, find us at MayhemDaughters.com