The Look & Sound of Leadership

A leader is getting pressured to stop being so prickly and gain some humility. With her coach, she explores whether it’s even possible for humility to ever be a strength. 

Core concepts in this episode:
Humility is confidence without defensiveness.
Assess yourself on the humility scale. “How do I respond to challenges?”
Humble leaders are confident in their authority.
Ask frequently: “How might I be wrong about this?”
Humility requires active listening.

Questions addressed in this episode:
> Are humble leaders perceived as weak?
Some people may see humble leaders as weak, but humble leaders are actually confident in their authority.

> If humble leaders need confidence, will they be seen as arrogant?
No, because humble leaders do not fight for dominance. They invite the opinions of others and are non-defensive when challenged.

> How can I tell whether I am humble?
Ask yourself, “When I am challenged, what feelings do I experience?” Leaders who respond non-defensively are high in humility.

> What practices can I adopt to develop more humility?
Ask yourself frequently: “How might I be wrong about this?"

> What are the benefits to being a humble leader?
Your team will experience psychological safety and move towards high performance.

Resources mentioned in this episode:
Humbitious: The Power of Low-Ego, High-Drive Leadership by Amer Kaissi explores how to be both ambitious and humble. 

Links for coaches:
Join Tom and a community of coaches at the Executive Coaching Special Interest Group.

The Los Angeles Chapter of International Coach Federation offers countless opportunities for CCEs and community building.

If you’re in the L.A. area, join the ICF-LA March Chapter meeting. And be sure to say ‘hi’ to Tom! Register here.

Each month, we share additional tools in our monthly email. 

If you’d like to explore Private Coaching with Tom, reach out to him at: [email protected].

This episode is tagged in three categories in our podcast library:
Executive Presence
Leadership
Personal Growth & Self-Development

Related Episodes:
122 - Achieving Authenticity
146 - Building Empathy
248 - Building Listening 
260 - How to Guarantee Psychological Safety
232 - Unlocking Executive Presence through Emotional Intelligence

Thank you so much for your reviews!

From The Look & Sound of Leadership

A chief officer is infuriated by the behavior of his egomaniacal CEO. With his coach, he explores how to be a healthy leader while reporting to a boss he doesn’t respect.
Core concepts in this episode:
Egomaniacs rattle our sense of self.
They will not change.
Worrying does not help.
Be accountable for how you show up. Manage yourself.
Don’t take anything personally. They’re just a piece on a chess board.
Ask yourself: “Am I seeing this person clearly?” Don’t allow emotions to drive your actions.
Ask yourself: “How do I want to show up?” You have choice about what you prioritize and how you react in the workplace.

Resources mentioned in this episode:
Crucial Conversations provides scripts and thoughts that will help you manage yourself when dealing with difficult people. 

Tom and host Dave Stachowiak discussed “How to Handle a Boss Who’s a Jerk” on this episode of Coaching for Leaders. Great tools if you have a challenging boss.

Before sharing your reactions in the workplace, consider the politics around you. These two episodes will get you “Leading with Political Savvy” Parts 1 and 2.  

Each month, there are additional tools in our monthly email. 

If you’d like to explore Private Coaching, reach out to Tom. [email protected].

This episode is tagged in three categories in our podcast library:
Managing Yourself
Leadership
Perception – How You Perceive Others

RELATED EPISODES
239- 5 Strategies for Dealing with Narcissists
189 - “Don’t Take Anything Personally”
245- Giving Upward Feedback
114- Gravitas
133- The Narcissist Executive

Thank you, thank you, thank you for your reviews!

Wishing you a year of growth and development! 

From The Look & Sound of Leadership team, thank you so much for listening.

A senior vice-president worries that attention on his people’s development will get overwhelmed in the volume of work. He asks his coach for tools to make the process effective and efficient. 

Download our free tool that maps the Three Conversations Development Plan.

Core Concepts 
Prioritizing professional development is hard.
The 3-Conversation model makes development easy for the leader and meaningful for the person.
The three conversations in summary: 
Define ‘what,’ ‘why’ and give homework;
The person reflects on the homework and how they plan to improve;
Periodic check-ins about the homework. ‘What are you learning?’

The leader’s role in these conversations: 
Clarify the ‘what’ and ‘why’ 
Listen and encourage
Ask, ‘What are you learning?’

You can sign-up for more resources and tools in our monthly email. 

If you’re thinking about coaching for yourself, or for someone on your team, let’s talk. [email protected].

This episode is tagged in three categories in our podcast library:
Feedback
Leadership
Management Skills

RELATED EPISODES
132  Coaching Your People
212  How to Coach Your People
258  How to Manage Defensive People
83  Leadership and Listening
206  Understanding Feedback

Thanks, as always, for your reviews!
Happy holidays. 

Until next time, thanks so much for listening.

From The Look & Sound of Leadership team

After a leader turns around the performance of one of his direct reports, he and his coach explore how it happened. And how to make it stick.  

Core ideas in the episode:
Workplaces improve when positive feedback is present
Our natural human negative bias is a barrier to giving positive feedback.
Learn to notice when things go well.
Tell people how they are helping solve the puzzle that is work.
Research says the most effective feedback ratio is 4-to-1, positive to developmental.

Positive Feedback might sound like this:
Recognize what’s going well – and be specific
Appreciate how it’s helping solve the puzzle
Express your thanks

Developmental Feedback might sound like this:
Describe what happened – and be specific
Explain how it affects the puzzle solving effort
Express your hope for a different outcome

You can Sign-up for more resources and tools in our monthly email. 

If you’re thinking about coaching for yourself, or for someone on your team, let’s talk. [email protected].

This episode is tagged in three categories in our podcast library:
Managing Yourself
Perception – How You Perceive Others
Relationship Building

Related episodes to listen to are:
146 - Building Empathy
119 - Creating Devoted Followers
212 - How to Coach Your People
255 - How to Deepen Relationships at Work
260 - How to Guarantee Psychological Safety

Thanks, as always, for your reviews!
Until next time, thanks so much for listening.
From The Look & Sound of Leadership team

A toxic boss destroys psychological safety on her team. One of her direct reports talks to his coach about how to survive. And how to keep his own team safe. 

Core ideas in the episode:
Don’t take other people’s bad behavior personally.
You are not a victim. You have choice.
Document repeated bad behavior.
Openly discussing mistakes without blame creates safety on a team.
As the leader, be willing to admit your own mistakes.
Ask people: “How do you think that went?” and “What could we do differently?” Then listen without debate or rebuttal.

A free infographic supports this episode. Download it here. 

The episode referred to about creating strong personal relationships is:
#199 Personal Connections.

Sign-up  for monthly resources and tools in our monthly email. 

Curious about coaching for yourself or someone on your team? Let’s talk. [email protected].

COACHES! Want to see this year’s pricing survey results? Pop me an email at: [email protected].

And come join the Executive Coaching Special Interest Group. Check it out here.
 
Get additional tools for keeping yourself and your team psychologically safe in our podcast library in these three categories:

Assertiveness
Leadership
Managing Yourself

Additional episodes to listen to are:
187 - Agreeable Disagreement
70 - Assertion Versus Aggression
"75 - Don’t Take Anything Personally”
222- The Conflict Conversation
181 - Inviting Dialogue

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Until next time, thanks!

From The Look & Sound of Leadership team